So if you think ‘PMS’ stands for Purely Miserable Spell, here is our guide to making things a little better for her and for you. PHOTO: FILE
If you are a guy, you’re likely to make this time of the month a little worse than it needs to be by just bumbling and saying totally inappropriate things. So if you think ‘PMS’ stands for Purely Miserable Spell, here is our guide to making things a little better for her and for you during this trying time of the month.
1. Never ever blame her mood swings on PMS.
You must never make the mistake of saying “Oh, I was wondering why you are acting so crazy! You are PMS-ing.”
This statement should be listed in the dictionary under the term “death wish”.
2. Never refer to her mood swings as mood swings. Women do not like to hear that they are being crazy when they are only being slightly less reasonable than usual. If you are confused about what to do, may I recommend silence?
This will at least ensure your safety.
3. If you are being asked a question, the rule of thumb is to agree with the stance of the woman who is PMS-ing. Deviating from her view at this delicate time is tantamount to picking a fight, at the end of which she will cry and leave you guilt-ridden for days.
Just say “yes”; it’s really very simple.
4. Don’t ever make the mistake of laughing at her. If you want to snigger because she is crying while watching The Flintstones, do it in the bathroom where she can’t see you. Laughing at her will only serve to make her see you as the most insensitive human being to have ever existed.
Bad idea.
5. If she wants to eat tuna on crackers drowned in maple syrup — just let her! Even better, grab a cracker and join her. Don’t tell her how disgusting it is. Pretend that you are enjoying it, and then throw up later.
6. Do not snuggle with her. PMS is a time during which body temperatures fluctuate wildly. She might be cold one second and hot the next. It’s best to observe her body language. Does she look cold? If so, extend a hot water bottle her way.
If she looks flushed, try an ice pack.
7. She is bloated and she knows it. Poking her belly is a sure-fire way of getting killed. Simple solution: Tell her she looks beautiful.
Published in The Express Tribune, Ms T, February 10th, 2013.
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COMMENTS (26)
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To all the females who're criticizing this article, you've probably been spared of the symptoms of PMS. Because anyone who has been through them time and time again would agree to every word of this article. Women become excessively moody and unreasonable when they're PMSing. Applying logic does not help. They're unreasonable, and they cannot help it. Kaput.
Junaid Dar: Why hats off ?Whats a zunn mureed BTW .
this is the most ridiculous thing i've ever read grow up
@Stranger Hats off to Indian and Western Media and now Our Media too.
Well written & thank you for the Info All men should know this keep up the Good work
Terribly sexist article...you should seriously consider another career.
A quick tip: If you ever get the chance to travel OUTSIDE of Pakistan, do not make such sexist comments as you are only going to embarrass yourself and your entire nation.
Its that time of the month where i just sit quitly and nod to everything
I avoid my girlfriend when she is PMSing and gift her flower later on. Never had a problem
With all due respect to women, the description sounds like of a monster, men beware :P (just a joke),
@Mustafa: you need to date somebody my friend or maybe just get married, its about time ;). Its happening with me, too, very soon, IA and the article sounds very common-sense like. You cannot argue with a woman, PMSing or not!
HARAM HARAM HARAM AAAAH NO MODESTY AHHHHH
Article obviously has a kernel of truth to which a bagful of spice has been added to make it enjoyable. Nice light touch.
And then they say we are a misogynist society
@Baba Ji: whats a zunn mureed?
And I thought Pak is a conservative nation. Wow articles on 'such' subjects now appearing openly .
Just keep at least 50 meters away - problem solved
In other words loose all your sanity, apply some wishy washy tecniques and above all dont be honest and trutful but more of an actor.
its very nice and informative article. i was unaware most of the things even at the age of 25. i have never been educated about a woman psyche even i am highly educated man. it must be done by parents or teachers. we need to develop awareness.
Ummm... So why dont women just get a trained dog instead of dating/marrying a guy? They do all this stuff anyway.
The author could have saved space, time and effort by just saying : pretend to be a "zann mureed" for a week !!!!
Simple Words: Just Go like blind and deaf in front of her... if needed, don't hesitate to call a day to night or vice versa...
The men who would be criticizing this article aren't considerate enough!!
This one is fairly sexist. So you are arguing that all women become unreasonable for a few days every month?
What implications it could have?
Sexist much?
So in a nut shell.. Just do whatever she says.. And Don't do anything which she doesn't like
Educative article written in such a light tone. Great work