Stop shaming divorced, widowed women: Hadiqa Kiani

The 44-year-old, who also happens to be a single mother, shared personal incident of a man proposing to her

Hadiqa Kiani, on Tuesday, took to Instagram to share how our society needs to stop shaming women who are divorced, separated or widowed. The 44-year-old singer, who also happens to be a single parent, shared a personal incident when a man proposed to her because 'she has a child'.

The Boohay Barian singer wrote on her Instagram story,"Stop using the child of a woman as a way to romance her or as a way to force her into a relationship. Because this society makes it seem that single mothers aren't capable of raising their children on their own."

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Kiani adopted a baby from the Edhi Foundation following the disastrous 2005 earthquake. "When I chose to adopt, I was told by many that it would ruin my chances of remarrying. I know other women who have been harassed by family members and people in our society," she stated.

"Being told that they must find a father for their kids. And many men are amazing and kind and loving but there are evil men who take advantage of a single mother's children. The same relatives who tell you to remarry never seem to mention those men. I say all of this to say: Respect the single mother's capabilities as a parent."

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The songstress also shared a message for all women. "It is your job to encourage and uplift your fellow women, not judge them or force them into a relationship just for the sake of being in one."

This is not the first time, celebrities have openly spoken about single mothers. Sarwat Gilani, who welcomed her son Araiz with husband Fahad Mirza last year, was questioned about family planning.

The actor took to Facebook and wrote, “Why is it anyone’s business to comment on how many children I should have?”

PHOTO: FILE

She went on to say, “Why is it anyone’s concern how late or soon should I have them and funnily enough why is it always men who have such lame concerns? My fertility is certainly not your problem nor an excuse to have a conversation or make a joke.”

She continued, “Don’t misunderstand my politeness for weakness! You all know who you are! Get a book on how to converse with a lady who already keeps you at a distance or next time you shall be tagged!"

Besides Gilani, the Mahiya famed singer Annie Khalid, who tied the knot for the second time in 2014, penned an Instagram post which went viral.

Annie is known for hits like Mahiya and Be My Baby. PHOTO: FILE

Her caption questioned if it is a sin to remarry. She went on to talk about the obvious monstrosity of the divorce-shame culture in Pakistan, saying, “What atrocious Pakistani culture we have where divorcee women are scandalised and stigmatised in our society. They become ‘black sheep’ or ‘damaged goods’."

Khalid also addressed how women are constantly blamed for the failure of marriage and how they don’t try hard enough to sustain the relationship. Moreover, the women who are supposed to be supportive during testing times often lack empathy which is utterly hurtful for those going through such a tough ordeal.

Pakistani musician Annie Khalid. PHOTO: FILE

The artist shared that she had to be the voice of many women who have been divorced, telling them how to not fall prey to such harsh comments.

After her post on Instagram, she garnered a lot of support online and continued to stress on the importance of  accepting the truth and moving on with life, gracefully.

Societal norms push women to be belittled if they choose to break free of an abusive or toxic marriage. And that notion itself screams for correction.



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