The writer is an actor, an anchor and a model. She is currently the host of “Morning with Juggun” on PTV Home and can be reached via twitter @JuggunKazim
When I was a four-year-old, one of my father’s friends asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up. According to my family, my instant response was ‘main bara ho kar actor banu ga’. This remained my mantra until the day I did, in fact, become a part of the media, not only as an actor but a model and anchor.
One could say I have been extremely lucky because my childhood dreams have come true; almost a Cinderella story.
Not quite. All that glitters is not gold.
As an actor, I worked hard, kept away from the hardcore party scene and focused on raising my son who came along just after I started working in Pakistan. Around this time, my mother’s very dear friend was looking for a bride for her son. I recommended a gorgeous, then single, model/actor.
My mother’s friend almost had an aneurysm. She ranted on about how she would never marry her son to a media floozy and how all girls in the media were prostitutes.
Public perception in Pakistan of women in the media is still that they are floozies. No matter what the facts, the assumption is that such women have zero brains and a general attitude problem. The consensus remains that media ‘types’ are okay to invite over for a cup of tea but never acceptable as a bahu or daughter-in-law.
The most frustrating situations are the ones involving obnoxious propositions. I still remember a phone call five years ago asking what I would charge for a ‘meal’ with the ambassador of a Western country. I was shocked. I wanted to scream and shout. Instead, I politely declined and told the caller that the next time he contacted me regarding any more ‘meals’, I would inform the police.
After that call, I just felt dirty and humiliated. I kept on analysing over and over what I had done to give the impression that I was ‘that type’ of a girl. In the end, I gave up. I had chosen my career and now I had to lump the consequences.
Three weeks ago, I met a girl in her early teens at a family function. She came up to me and told me she was a huge fan. I asked her to sit with me and we started chatting. As soon as she sat down, she told me she wanted to be a model. My heart sank. I looked at her innocent face and I didn’t know how to respond.
When I eventually started speaking, I found myself repeating my mother’s words. I told her she must complete her education first, that modelling was not as glamorous as it seems and that people are very judgmental.
My mother was vehemently against my working in the media, something that I resented. Today, I have finally understood that her concerns, like those of so many other parents, stemmed not from fear as to what her child would do once in the media. In fact, the fear was how people would respond to her child and the uncomfortable situations I would have to face.
If I ever have a daughter, I will be honoured if she follows in my footsteps and joins the media. But I would also be petrified of what she would have to face day to day in this plastic world. It’s a catch 22: damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
Published in The Express Tribune, October 28th, 2013.
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COMMENTS (10)
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As the old saying goes "by the time I realized my father was right, my son was saying 'dad you're wrong!'"
i am unmarried and more than willing to marry a girl from the media girls from ET are especially welcome juggun you are so wrong
With time i too have understood why some people are against professional education its not that they are against women getting ahead many fear it will even be bad for the women who gets into this position and they will suffer themselves. And this i have experienced first handed. I never tell others to go for a professional education. Take education which is easier for you in everyway.
Media is one thing any highyl educated women also gets people's judgemental behaviour. I have been told so many times that being i doctor how can i like knitting, sewing or cooking. How can i like company of many kids at one time. And if something goes wrong it must be me as with this education you must have an attitude. How can you not have?
Why capital letter 'I' pointing yourself...!
True this is written honestly, but it looks like a rant in the drawing room rather than an intellectual article. I respect the fact that one has to fight stereotype tags in the industry but what makes you think that women in the media are the only ones subjected to it.
A female minister of state is supposedly trashed as is a woman who climbs the corporate ladder faster than men even if she deserves it. So i think the "tags" are eventually removed by how gracefully one carries ones self. Respect is not something you can take for granted, it has to be earned!
I am truly blown away by the intellectual depth in this article--only fit to be published in ET!
The general perception has been perpetuated by the majority of the people in this industry, men and women both. Gone are the days when art was respected, today socialites are looked up to and models are seen as something 'dirty'. In this respect, our society needs to becme more liberal before social acceptability of professions where women are in the public eye and a part of the mysterious world of media comes.
The honesty comes across as genuine and that's what makes this worth reading. Let me be honest, I am in awe of artistic people because I feel that they have something special, they are gifted and its a shame that this is not appreciated as much as it should be.