Selena Gomez says she struggles to enjoy joy, reveals fear after marrying Benny Blanco

Selena Gomez has opened up about her ongoing struggle to fully embrace happiness, admitting she often fears moments of joy will be followed by something bad.

Speaking at Fortune’s Most Powerful Women conference in Washington, D.C. on October 15, the 33-year-old singer and entrepreneur reflected on her mindset when good things happen, including her recent marriage to music producer Benny Blanco.

“This is how I work personally, but something great happens in my life, I expect something bad to happen,” Gomez said. “So instead of being present and saying, ‘OK, wow, we’ve done a great thing,’ which I do, I’m always thinking, ‘OK, but this could all go away tomorrow, so how can I make sure that doesn’t happen?’”

The Rare Beauty founder explained that this mindset has made it difficult for her to fully enjoy even the most positive milestones in her life.

“I would say that’s my biggest conflict sometimes when wonderful things happen,” she continued. “I got married and then I was sobbing because I was like, ‘I’m gonna die the next day.’ I just think that’s a little life thing.”

Gomez married 37-year-old Benny Blanco in California on September 27 after two years of dating. The ceremony was attended by several of the couple’s close friends, including Taylor Swift, Steve Martin, Martin Short, Paul Rudd, Cara Delevingne, Ed Sheeran and SZA.

According to a source close to the couple, “There was so much love in the room. At the reception, everyone was letting loose and celebrating them well into the night.” The source added that Gomez and Blanco were “glowing all night” and “couldn’t stop smiling.”

Blanco later shared photos from the celebration on Instagram, writing, “I married a real life Disney princess.”