When I am gone

Tears rolled down his face as he shared the anecdotes of the past few days with his colleague

The writer is a Fulbright PhD candidate at Texas A&M University and a graduate of the University of Tokyo

Tears rolled down his face as he shared the anecdotes of the past few days with his colleague. “We always congratulate people when they tell us that their kids have gone abroad for higher education or job; but when my son is gone, I feel very lonely and sad,” said Mr Ahmed who had retired from a government department as General Manager and is now serving in an educational institute. Patriotism, strong work ethics and hope have always been the hallmark of his lectures.

Being a staunch patriot, he served the country for more than thirty years and wanted his four children to settle in his homeland and stay together. All was good and according to the ‘plan’ until one day his son got a fully funded scholarship to pursue his PhD in the USA. Despite his resistance, the family decided that the son should make his way abroad and then help his younger siblings settle abroad too.

Two days have passed since Mr Ahmed dropped his son at the airport and he still is unable to accept the new reality of life. He has worked tirelessly all his life to give a good education to his children and like every parent he wanted them to be very successful i.e. financially strong, having a world-class degree and having strong work ethics. What seems uncomfortable to him is the reality that all this was no longer achievable in the country of his love — Pakistan. His son, like many others, had to shift to another part of the globe.

“All my life I have been content with whatever I could earn. Living on a shoe-string was never a problem, but somehow nowadays the younger generation is becoming more materialistic,” he lamented like most people with grey hair.

However, what he does not realise is the fact that time has changed now. Like most of us, the country he calls home has become a hub of chaos, inflation, lawlessness and illiteracy; and people who want to contribute have to face the music. The whims of the powerful run the country. Hence the younger generation sees no respite and no light at the end of the tunnel.

His son has been working at a private company for three years on a stipend, which could barely cover the cost of his transport. His job did not offer any security, and there was no health coverage, no accommodation, or mutual funds to help him get settled with time.

Initially, Mr Ahmed’s son did not want to go abroad but was left with no choice considering the unprofessional and unconducive work environment at home. He now boasts how the American system is helping him realise his true potential.

Brain drain is a serious concern, but an even more grave concern is that now the young generation has no pull factor to return or stay in the country. Even those who wish are compelled to fly. Those who return home from abroad are taught a lesson. Therefore, the urge to migrate is intensified every day.

Pakistanis are willing to walk and swim even through the valley of death to reach greener pastures. Many perished along the way but the rest remain undeterred and the cycle continues.

Considering the current scenario, it seems inevitable that a lot more parents are going to be in the shoes of Mr Ahmed. A lot more children will be compelled to work and settle abroad in places where they are considered human and treated like one, especially females.

Perhaps Mr Ahmed and his children and all of us are the victims of the society we have created in the last four decades. It’s the outcome of the actions of every retiring person who has made this country unwelcoming for one’s children and grandchildren.

Those who used to think that money would solve every problem are now waiting sitting on heaps of wealth for their loved ones working and earning in other parts of the globe.

Like Mr Ahmed, many are perplexed that there will be no one to carry forward their legacy and take care of the assets they have amassed with so difficult. Their eyes seem to ask, “What will happen when I am gone?”

Published in The Express Tribune, November 9th, 2023.

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