All eyes on Shoaib Malik

For as long as I’ve known Shoaib Malik, he’s been fiercely determined to make a comeback

PHOTO: REUTERS

For as long as I’ve known Shoaib Malik (which is a little under a year), he’s been fiercely determined to make a comeback. There’s something remarkably likeable and endearing about the all-rounder, whom I’ve been tracking. His slew of achievements in the preceding months, many of which have found mentions in my column, are briskly ferrying him to his goal. At 33, he may not have long to remain in the playing-eleven, and must therefore milk everything that comes his way and shine with consistency. When some of his colleagues were recently sidelined on medical grounds, it paved the way for Shoaib’s induction into the team. He seized the opportunity by the horns and delivered with a bang. Despite a discouragingly scanty turnout in the stands, he scored a monumental 245 against England at Abu Dhabi in his first Test match for Pakistan in five years. His emphatic return is as much a story of the selectors’ faith in him as it is of the diligence, focus and perseverance of a hungry professional. It helps that Sania Mirza is riding the peak of her career. Her many accomplishments have been a huge inspiration for Shoaib, who, for one, will agree that the aphorism ‘Behind every successful man…’ is far from passe. 

The woman behind Shoaib Malik

Tailpieces

1) Playboy’s decision to stop showing nudes seemed inevitable, what with perversion being available to all, and in abundance at the click of a mouse. Probably something its (now) 89-year-old big daddy, Hugh Hefner, hadn’t predicted as much as we hadn’t imagined a day when a bunny, Carla Howe (sounds suspiciously similar to ‘whore’), would call his legendary mansion boring and squalid. The beginning of the end?

2) The picture of a burka-clad woman, lying down drunk in the streets of Riyadh, is a reminder of what is known but rarely acknowledged. The party scene in Saudi Arabia, hardcore even by Western standards, tells us that bohemia and rebellion thrive in suppression — much as in Pakistan, where everything happens behind closed doors. There are rules and they can be broken; just don’t get caught! Or if you fear that happening, head abroad and let loose, the way the royals and rich brats do! If I were a woman who had to live my life in a hypocritical, male-dominated world, I’d be brewing alcohol and getting drunk whenever possible too.

Shoaib to Sania: You are symbol of hope and dreams


3) You have to salute Canada for electing a 43-year-old as prime minister. Seen Justin Trudeau? The implausibly good-looking stud will hopefully inject passion and energy into the country’s safe and staid policies. On Election Day, Trudeau, sporting jeans and a leather jacket, posed for a photo, standing on the thighs of two of his mates to make a cheerleading pyramid. For those of us tired of being governed by fogeys, it’s time to move to Canada!

4) Has the Pakistani film industry had a bigger entertainer than Meera? I’m surprised that her ‘howlarious’ off-screen antics haven’t found their way into an unofficial biopic on the 40-year-old, whose biological clock, I am told, stopped ticking at 29. I haven’t stopped laughing ever since I read about her fleeing in the middle of a stage play, with a stash of money. That, I suspect, may have been funnier than the play itself!

Meera takes to her heels with Rs0.7m

5) The world has gone stark-raving mad. A French couple, obsessed with Barbie and Ken, splashed £200,000 on cosmetic surgery to resemble the dolls. Going by the pictures I saw of them, the Barbie and Ken dolls look more real!

Published in The Express Tribune, October 22nd, 2015.

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