I wish for health for myself so that my father can stop worrying about me: Saheefa Jabbar Khattak

Pakistani actor Saheefa Jabbar Khattak has long been vocal about her mental health battles, and in a recent Instagram statement, she delved deeper into her ongoing struggles. Khattak’s candid words shed light on the emotional toll her condition has taken on her and her family, particularly her father.

In her latest post, Khattak shared, "No father deserves to see his daughter in pain. I wish for health for myself so that my father can stop worrying about me. I don't want this hollowness to go away because I can't handle it; Now I want it to go away because my father can't take it. Allah, you are both the Most Merciful and the Most Compassionate. Either make me so strong, that I can bear this pain myself, or take it away forever. You know what's best for me and what tests I should go through. I leave it in Your hands. Just make it easier for my family."

This deeply personal message follows a series of previous posts where Khattak has shared her journey with mental health, highlighting the challenges and the stigma associated with it. In an earlier statement, she expressed, "I don't know about fulfilment anymore, but words matter. The right words, at the right time. I'm feeling this hollowness in my heart, exhausted by the pain and panic returning, the numbness, the fear.” The actor furthered on to say, “Also now I'm ashamed of it, ashamed of this disease I have, why? Because it makes me feel shallow knowing my privileges and support system. It's relentless, and I find myself asking Khawaja Saab, 'Why am I like this?' As always, he never fails to say the right thing: 'You are the best the way you are. Some lows in life do not define you as a person.'"

Khattak has been transparent about her use of prescribed antidepressants, sharing the complexities of managing her mental health. "Being on prescribed antidepressants has given me mixed feelings. Initially, I felt numb—not happy or sad, just numb to every feeling, thought, and emotion. Slowly, I decided to lower the dosage to see if I have healed, but I felt an extreme shift. Previously the numbness I mentioned started to make me feel good. Now, I feel pain, fear, and anxiety coming back. I am lil lil scared too. But it's alright I'll get through this one too."

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