Parents and early education of children

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child.— George Santayana

The umbilical link between parents and students is far more impactful on education than any other factor deemed important in the education system. If parents are educated, no one in the whole world except them can teach or guide their children in the best way. The role of teachers cannot be denied, yet when parents adopt the avatar of teachers, they prove to be inspiring teachers.

When parents send their children to educational institutions thinking them a nuisance at home, the emotional bond between parents and children starts depleting. It is not a matter of whether parents are educated or not, rather it is the love and concern needed to ensure emotional and educational growth of their children. In America homeschooling is prescribed legally for children of early age. But here in our country parents get anxious for their children’s education out of home as early as from three years of age.

Moreover with the advent of private schools, this trend of education out of home at so tender an age has gained buy-in from parents. The early child care and education at these schools housed in small buildings are mere mirage. Sudden and frequent change of teachers in local private schools makes students vulnerable to emotional disequilibrium, demotivating them in the learning process.

Some parents are dangerously emotionally distant from their children when they hand over them to schools and teachers, giving them the carte blanche to ensure their children’s education. This is quite an unhealthy practice. At parents-teachers meetings, it is often observed that parents do not show any affiliation and responsibility for the poor performance of their children.

Parents of public sector schools threaten the school administration and teachers not to call them up for any matter related to their children’s education. They hold schools and teachers solely responsible for the education and character building of their children. Such laissez-faire parents even don’t listen to their children if the latter complain of any behavioural threats from the peers or unaccommodating treatment of teachers. Such children develop psychological and emotional aberrations marring their learning and moral nurturing.

One of the most popular strategies for protecting against our fear of being hurt and rejected is avoidance. This coping strategy is created as a result of our initial dissatisfaction with the individuals who are supposed to take care of us. When parents shame their children in front of teachers, it becomes counterproductive pushing students to quiet quitting in the learning process. Students’ lapses in studies must be discussed in private between teachers and parents not in the presence of students. But that requires a devoted concern in parents and teachers.

Parents of lower social strata do not show any interest in the education of their children partly because of the consumption of their time and energy in earning their daily wages, and partly because of the low and delayed absorption of the educated youth into jobs, needed to resuscitate their anaemic financial health.

It’s the utter failure of parenting when parents report on their children’s misbehaviour or carelessness at home to teachers in order to discipline them. This is a very intriguing scenario. After all why are students expected to obey their teachers and not the parents? Parents’ lapse and laxity in fulfilling their parental duties, and emotional detachment make their words hollow whereas the devotion and dedication in a genuine teacher lend metanoic impact to his words. As such teachers are nonexistant now, the impact of words of these ersatz professionals is transient as students obey them willy-nilly under the constant fear of being chastised.

Parents are their child’s first teachers, advocates and motivators. Their contribution is inevitable for his holistic development.

Published in The Express Tribune, June 7^th, 2023.

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