Family meetings facilitated ahead of Eid

As Eidul Azha approaches, exclusive meet-ups of divorced couples with their underage children have begun in the Judicial Complex, on the order of family courts, under the supervision of court officials.

Parents usually bring along a number of Eid gifts for their children and every father gets an hour to meet his child. Family judges have permitted to conduct these meet-ups. Separate rooms have been allocated for this purpose. These rooms are well ventilated and safe. Closed-circuit cameras are installed for enhanced security along with the presence of judicial security guards.

Fathers, who have been separated from their children, make a formal request to the family judge for a visit, upon which the court issues an order to summon the children living with the mothers. These meetings are held at a fixed time. Similarly, those mothers who have remarried after divorce can also visit their children with the permission of either their grandmother or their father.

On Friday, several divorced couples came to the Judicial Complex to meet their children. Many fathers brought toys, clothes, sweets, etc. for their children. Three such fathers even brought mobile phones as gifts. These fathers hugged and kissed their children with tears in their eyes. They even fed them snacks with their hands.

Goodbyes are often painful to watch. Both children and their fathers keep on looking at each other until they are out of each other’s sight.

Several mothers also come to meet their children with the same passion.

One of the fathers, Arshad Tabassum, called it a painful day. He said, "It has been four years since the divorce. I have moved to Lahore whereas my ex-wife is still in Rawalpindi. Every year, I get to meet my children on Eidul Fitr and Eidul Azha. Currently, they are enrolled in the 8th and 6th standard. I remarried, but I have no children with her. I miss them both even more now. I got divorced over a minor dispute, which is why I would advise all those who have filed divorce cases in the courts, to withdraw their cases. Do not make this an ego issue because this would ruin the future of your children. I am worried and I regret doing this to my children."

Similarly, Bilqis Khanum, who got divorced over mere misunderstandings, has three children. She’s raising them all on her own. She did not remarry. She said, “Women should not be considered as shoes. Husbands should try to cater to the desires of their wives. I am currently working as a maid in a private school. I also sew clothes and do embroidery. I have never stopped my children from meeting their father. They are also his children; he can spend on them too.”

Another woman, Duniya Qureshi, said that she had two children. Her husband used to quarrel with her every day, which led her to take khula. She remarried and has two more children. She said, “When I remarried, my children from my previous marriage were handed over to their grandmother on a court order. I miss my children. I meet them often. I have also introduced them to their step-siblings. I have forgotten the past, I have no regrets and I have moved on in life.”

Children who had been separated from their parents, looked happy upon meeting them. Most of them were happy to see toys and clothes. The young ones among them started to play with toys right away. Although the parents seemed happy seeing them play, their eyes were full of tears thinking about both the past and the future.

Published in The Express Tribune, July 3^rd, 2022.