Marriage is a festive occasion but that was not the case for me: Child marriage survivor in 'CWK'

‘Conversations with Kanwal’ second episode of season three focuses on child marriages

The second episode of Conversations with Kanwal (CWK) was released this week and revolved around the alarming issue of child marriages. The episode kicked off with host, Kanwal Ahmed, narrating a World Health Organisation’s (WHO) study that stated that 21% of girls married in Pakistan are under the age of 18, which falls under the category of child marriage. The host further shed light on the importance of consent by highlighting that these marriages are arranged without the bride’s consent and hence are forced.

“The number of child marriages exceeds the statistics given by WHO,” said Supreme Court advocate Zia Ahmed Awan. “Children who undergo such forceful events are deprived of receiving knowledgeable education, be it a male or female. Getting a child married is simply stripping them away from childhood. You as a parent have taken away the fun, education, physical growth, and wisdom,” Awan exclaimed.

A crime in the open

Ahmed narrated how the whole act of child marriages not only leads to a traumatic life but also premature death of young girls. “It takes away reproductive rights from a child which doesn’t fall under human rights to this day. It simply results in the premature death of young girls, early pregnancies when their bodies have not been formed to bring another life as of yet,” she said.

Marriage without consent has a number of comprehensive laws in Pakistan so the large issue is the lack of implementation.  “Consent can only be given when one’s 18 or above, any union under this age will be categorised as rape,” said Awan while elaborating on the legality of what counts as consent.

A story of the victim

Later in the episode, a 16-year-old victim of child marriage shared her ordeal.  “I was always told that I am not very good-looking that’s why I have to get married earlier so that my flaws are overshadowed by my youth,” recalled Nimra.

“I had always imagined marriage to be a festive occasion where you dress up and feast but for me it turned out to be the opposite,” said Nimra. Their Nikkah took place online and when she finally moved abroad to meet her husband, she was welcomed with a slap on her face.

“I was tortured both physically and mentally with my mother-in-law supporting her son by narrating religious quotes whenever I would raise an eyebrow,” said Nimra while remembering the ordeal.

As Nimra’s visit visa expired a new kind of pain awaited her back home – the pain of a mother in law who retorted to even harsher means this time around. “I was physically tortured by my mother-in-law who would heat up a tong and beat me with that. Till this day the burn marks on my body remind me of the trauma I went through,” concluded Nimra.

Nimra was eventually sent back to her home and is now a part of a healthy second marriage.