Trump or Biden?

Seeing Trump lose would be of tremendous entertainment


Imran Jan September 10, 2020
The writer is a political analyst. Email: imran.jan@gmail.com. Twitter @Imran_Jan

In 2020, we saw events that usually happen in a decade. The year started with Trump’s impeachment. Then came the pandemic, followed by unstoppable and unabated civil unrest in America. While all that is ongoing, the mother of all threats, mother nature is coming for us. 

Floods are becoming a new normal. Karachi and other cities are competing to claim the crown of the most flooded area. California wildfires have burnt over two million acres of land at the time of this writing. To put that in perspective, that is about 10 times of NYC. Texas and Louisiana were hit by two major hurricanes two weeks ago. North Korea, South Korea, and Japan are facing their own typhoons this week. 

Election season has started in America while the country is still in the hurricane season. Both seasons end in November. As that was not enough, NASA is saying an asteroid is going to pass near our planet on the US presidential election eve. Many Jews became great comedians because that was their natural reaction to the brutal conditions they were in. Given these precarious times; I have decided to seek entertainment as well. 

Should we vote for Trump or Biden? Well, let us examine. Trump does not believe in climate change, calling it a “hoax”. He believes in no science. The vast literature of his tweets are a great testament to that imbecility. Biden says he believes in climate science and he would take action to curb the threat of climate change. He has advocated for the US to remain in the Paris Agreement, which Trump withdrew from. 

However, scientists say that even meeting the Paris goals, 2°C warming, would leave earth an almost uninhabitable place by 2100 because at 2°C warming; climate change would present challenges such as reduction in GDP growth, climate refugees, climate migrants, climate conflict, excessive heat, pandemics, more wars, more suicides, dying oceans, dwindling water resources, and so forth. 

Furthermore, Biden recently speaking in Pittsburg said, “I am not banning fracking”. That’s like saying, I’m against murder but I won’t ban open shooting in crowded malls. Fracking releases methane in the atmosphere, which doubles the speed of heating compared to carbon emissions. And that brings me to the quintessential hypocrisy of the Democratic Party. The Republicans tell you they will kill you and then kill you. The Democrats smile and say they are against killing and then kill you anyway. Remember you were told the devil you know was better. 

Trump wants to end America’s longest war. Biden doesn’t seem much inclined to do so given he belongs to the traditional class of presidents. The one that wages wars instead of ending them. Moreover, Biden said he would defend India against any threats. India would lobby aggressively to highlight Pakistan as that threat. 

Given climate change and the possible belligerence toward Pakistan, a country very close to my heart, my strategy for this election is pure entertainment. I wouldn’t be happy with any of them winning, I would rather be happy with either of them losing. The grief of seeing either side win would be cancelled out by the pleasure of the other side losing.  

But I might vote for Biden because seeing the smiling war criminal lose wouldn’t be much entertainment as he would just give his grandiose concession speech and exit. Seeing Trump lose would be of tremendous entertainment. The army might be called in to force him to leave because he has hinted at not accepting the result if he lost the election. It would be wise to sell Netflix stock because everyone would be watching live news instead. We can all use some entertainment. That is what democracy has become. 

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