PSL diary

Shoaib Akhtar, infamous for his foot-in-the-mouth disease, is keen to acquire a team & play godfather to Mohammad Amir

It is both amusing and ironic that a nation with huge economic woes has announced its own IPL-plagiarised property, Pakistan Super League (PSL), into which it will invest a king’s ransom. Logically, one would have expected the inaugural edition to take place in its home country, but with no quality international player willing to visit Pakistan, there is little choice but to shift the setting to the Middle East.

At the launch, Shahryar Khan paid a warm tribute to BCCI President Jagmohan Dalmiya. He lamented that Pakistan cricket had lost a sincere friend. Sadly, the passing away of Dalmiya could throw cold water on Khan’s ambitious plan of organising a series between India and Pakistan in December. Despite the snubbing of Pakistani players in the IPL, and more recently in the Indian Hockey League, cricket lovers from both countries are biting their nails anxiously, hoping that the BCCI will relent. Khan, for whom a potential refusal from the BCCI will amount to an ego blow, is already working on Plan B — inviting another cricket-playing nation.

A well-known mobile phone brand has made an aggressive pitch to the PCB to acquire the Karachi team. To make the pitch attractive, it has promised to secure Bollywood heavyweights as the team’s ambassadors. Bollywood presence means more snob value, more glamour and more eyeballs. This isn’t music for a fistful of Pakistani actors who would like to believe otherwise about Bollywood sovereignty.

When asked if she would invest in a team, Iman Ali said that Pakistani actresses were poor compared to their Bolly counterparts (presumably referring to the likes of Shilpa Shetty and Preity Zinta who have been owners of IPL teams). While many mocked Iman for being stupid, her statement might not be necessarily off the mark.

Shoaib Akhtar, infamous for his foot-in-the-mouth disease, is keen to acquire a team and play godfather to Mohammad Amir. With the ban on Amir being lifted, the latter is understandably desperate to return to international cricket. One might argue that the 23-year-old has learnt his lesson and should be given a chance to prove his renewed worth, but whether the other players will agree to share the dressing room with the tainted sportsman is what needs to be seen. While I will not entirely refute Ramiz Raja’s comment on the participation of Amir, Salman Butt and Mohammed Asif sullying the reputation of the PSL, it does seem odd that in the same breath Raja chooses to be silent about the not-so-spotless image of his PSL co-ambassador Wasim Akram.

 

Tailpieces

1) With Eidul Azha nearing, the trend to spend disproportionate money on cattle as a status symbol robs the essence of what Islam teaches: simplicity.

2) Andy Murray has declared that he will donate £50 to the refugee crisis for every ace he scores this year. I have generally found Scots to be quite generous. He is obviously the exception.

3) David Cameron was allegedly made to carry out an outrageous initiation rite as a member of a club while at Oxford. The allegation has been denied by Downing Street, but if true, my mind boggles to think about what else he may have been made to do.

4) Believe it or faint, Snoop Dogg is rolling his love for cannabis into a new lifestyle website intended to be an online “encyclopedia” for anything anyone would want to know about pot. I’m sure the stoners are high on the announcement!

5) US Republican presidential hopeful Ben Carson says he does not believe a Muslim should become president. Considering the US Constitution forbids religious tests for holding public office, Carson’s statement, while stemming from a more generic international anti-Islam sentiment, smacks of racism.

Published in The Express Tribune, September 24^th, 2015.

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