My battle against depression

Published: November 8, 2014

Living a mentally and physically balanced healthy life is a colossal task. Many people have penned accounts of the challenges they go through while suffering from depression or any other serious mental disorder. But hardly ever anyone depicts his or her ‘success story’ of treatment.

Some prominent figures such as the late Princess Diana and Catherine Zeta Jones have battled depression. Depression, I believe, is an illness of sensitive people and not the selfish ones. Unfortunately, since mental health problems are reckoned as stigmas, even educated people, particularly in Pakistan, do not talk about such disorders.  My life from a reporter to a writer changed altogether after I came out of depression. Last year, my beloved father’s sudden death shattered my life. Despite knowing that death is a reality, I always hoped he will return. I was depressed before his death.

My husband insisted that I see a psychiatrist, and I am grateful to him for this suggestion. Since I started taking anti-depressants, my life changed altogether. I tried to take interest in dynamic activities of life including reading and writing. I focused on things that could give me little pleasures. I spent my weekends with friends and tried out new dishes. I attempted to make every day at work a productive one. I wrote stories and features and vented to my feelings by means of words.

But, while doing all this, I was asked not to discuss personal experiences in the media. Why not? If an educated person will not write about taboos, then who else will? I have not only suffered a lot but have also observed sufferings all over the world. I will keep on talking about the pains I go through. This emotional and mental anguish never fades away until one seeks treatment. I thought of fighting with those who create unhappiness in life and walk away scot-free. I overcame depression and now I am living a balanced and content life. It is better that we seek professional help to make our life a happy one as a happy person can help others make happy. We are blessed with life to lead it with an aim and not to be depressed and disappointed. It is a pity that treatment for depression or any other mental disorder is expensive in Pakistan. The government needs to allocate more funds facilitating provision of free medicines to those who cannot afford them. Let’s work together to heal up each other’s pain and make Pakistan a bright and healthy nation. As they say: no health without mental health.

Published in The Express Tribune, November 8th, 2014.

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Reader Comments (5)

  • Stranger
    Nov 8, 2014 - 9:31PM

    Glad u bounced back . Atta gal .


  • Muhammad Yousuf
    Nov 9, 2014 - 12:55AM

    i out ant out agree with the writer… because mind is leader and all other organs are workers if leader is not well then performance of workers cannnot be good….. no health with out mental health is true.


  • karachi mirchi
    Nov 9, 2014 - 2:11AM

    Very courageous of you to write about your personal experience. People need more awareness about this deadly ailment.


  • Rubina Jabbar
    Nov 9, 2014 - 3:16AM

    The reason why married women go into depression is not a secret. Its almost the same across all cultures and races.
    You, too, in fact contributed an emotional piece in this regard, presenting your personal life and everyday battle against it as an example. That was great because it takes a lot of courage to say sad things about your personal life in public. You received a well-deserved huge readers response. We applauded your courage and also sympathized with you, many suggesting you get out of this painful relationship for good.
    However, in this piece, you mentioned him — the person who caused you so much pain and depression and made every effort to belittle you and your personal and professional achievements– as your rescuer who pointed you the right direction. My husband insisted that I see a psychiatrist, and I am grateful to him for this suggestion.
    That sounds kind of strange…
    But I am glad to know that you have sorted out your problems and now feel happy and content in your married status.
    I apologize for my remarks if they made you feel uncomfortable. But, I believe, as a reader I have every right to voice my concerns, no matter whether they sounded bitter or sweet…
    Stay happy and healthy!


  • Zaid.Eye
    Mar 14, 2015 - 12:09AM

    It is a fact. We lead our life in a materialist world. The world, where some people ‘believe in’ not healing, but hurting others’ emotions. They find even pleasure seeing others in pain. At time, they make fun of others who are passing through some psychological challenges.

    However, one is truly blessed to have, at least, a dependable friend. The friend, who is trustworthy to share with personal feelings. The one who helps fight his companion against depression. The debacle to win at all cost.

    Indeed, the writer has shown a considerable level of courage by discussing her personal days of depression. In general, why some people avoid sharing their personal matter publicly, of course, the fear of being bullied.

    Well, I like the thought-provoking line: “Depression, I believe, is an illness of sensitive people and not the selfish ones.”Recommend

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