The writer is Editor of The Express Tribune
Pakistani men are possibly one of the most violent in the world today – towards their womenfolk. It’s not enough to harass, intimidate and abuse them, we burn our women, cut their noses and other body parts, throw acid on them and kill them on the slightest pretext. In most instances, in the name of honour.
Age is never a bar. This week, a US judge convicted an elderly Pakistani immigrant of murdering his wife in their New York home, savagely beating her over the head.
75 year old Noor Hussain, frail and beset with medical problems, believed it was his right to discipline his wife, his third marriage, when she did not cook food as per his desires. She had made Daal instead of Saalan. So he killed her.
This mindset is not exclusive to our rich and powerful. It seems this is a trait that crosses all social, ethnic, religious and cultural divides. In some ways, it unites many men in Pakistan.
In fact, that was the plea that Hussain’s lawyer took in court. She said that her client was culturally raised to believe that he had a right to discipline his wife.
Noor Hussain was unlucky that he was caught out by the American system. Similar is the case of many British Pakistanis who have tried to impose their will on their wives and daughters – in some instances killing them for the “crime” of marrying according to their wishes. Eventually many end up in jail.
In many instances, such families have had sent their daughters to Pakistan to be married against their will where they are then kept imprisoned. There is a full time section at the British High Commission in Islamabad that helps such girls return to the UK.
Not so in Pakistan. Here it seems our system endorses, if not encourages, violence against women. In most instances, the women remain quiet. Many rape victims end up committing suicide. Those who speak up or demand justice are instead punished.
Who can forget Fakhra Yunus, whose husband threw acid on her face. That husband remains scott-free. Last year he even stood for elections. She, on the other hand, committed suicide in 2012 despite support from the Italian government to help rehabilitate her.
Who can forget the case of Mukhtara Mai? She still has not gotten justice. Instead of punishing the rapists, the government was more interested in defending our image. President Musharraf said that he did not let her go abroad because she would bad-mouth Pakistan. Then minister Attiya Inayatullah and advisor Neelofer Bakhtiyar were used to bully Mukhtara Mai. Musharraf famously said once that women get raped so that they can get a visa to Canada.
This week we saw another horrifying incident. The stoning to death of a 25 year old woman, Farzana Parveen. She was attacked by 20 family members on the steps of the Lahore High Court because she married a man of her choice. While she was being attacked, the police looked on and did nothing.
During the assault she was hit on the head with bricks from a nearby construction site and died. The incident triggered outrage across the world, but not much in Pakistan. What followed was even more worrisome. Parveen’s husband Mohammad Iqbal then confessed that he had killed his first wife to marry Farzana. And that he was spared prison because he was forgiven for the act by his son. One can only wonder.
According to a non-official count 5,151 women have been subjected to violence this year in Punjab alone — among them 774 murdered, 217 killed for ‘honour’, 1,569 abducted, 706 raped/gang-raped and 427 driven to suicide. The number of women killed for giving birth to girls has gone up. In one recent incident, a man was reported to have thrown acid on his wife’s face for delivering a girl.
The “crimes” of women in Pakistani society are many and varied. Those mentioned above are the visible ones. The invisible violence is more numerous and causes greater havoc. Common forms of non-cognisable violence are preventing girls from acquiring education, the destruction of girls’ schools, restrictions on women’s mobility, denial of jobs on merit and equal wage for equal work, child marriages, forced marriages, and tendering of girls to resolve feuds. The list goes on.
Published in The Express Tribune, June 2nd, 2014.
Like Opinion & Editorial on Facebook, follow @ETOpEd on Twitter to receive all updates on all our daily pieces.
COMMENTS (29)
Comments are moderated and generally will be posted if they are on-topic and not abusive.
For more information, please see our Comments FAQ
@John B
I didn't know you were as much an expert in Islamic law as you are in economics. Within one paragraph, you attribute certain practices in Pakistan to Sharia law and on another article, completely rubbish Thomas Pikkety. May I know where you got your education from with such profound insights?
@Silly Politics - perhaps you missed the stats in the article. "According to a non-official count 5,151 women have been subjected to violence this year in Punjab alone — among them 774 murdered, 217 killed for ‘honour’, 1,569 abducted, 706 raped/gang-raped and 427 driven to suicide." That's saying something. You also missed that the writer hedged his statement with the use of the words "possibly" and "one of". The point is not whether Pakistani men are the worst purveyors of misogynist violence or not. Rather, no matter which way you slice it, the present situation is completely horrific.
@Ch. Allah Daad: Most psychological studies indicate that boys grow up to treat their wives the same way as their father treated their mother. A male child growing up in an environment of domestic abuse is highly likely to repeat the same act on growing up. A female child growing up in the same environment is highly likely to accept being a victim of domestic violence
@Gp65: The first step in solving a problem is to acknowledge its existance. Talk to a woman who has been raped, mutilated or burned by acid. The nationality of the man or men who did this to her will not matter. These atrocities are carried out everyday all over the subcontinent as is apparent in the news. The only thing in common is that it is the women who are targeted. It is less about the country and more about the mentality of our men. I say "our" because, though we have drawn lines on the map, centuries of culture cannot be distilled out .
@Riaz Ahmed: You missed the point, which was "Pakistani men are possibly one of the most violent in the world today" was an unsubstantiated and unscientific statement. One cannot prove that Pakistani men are most violent in the world today without a comparison, hopefully with statistics. Let me reiterate it that the problem in Pakistan is severe and needs urgent remedial attention. Please read comments carefully and do not read into what is not implied. Thanks.
@Aby K: This maybe how things are in Pakistan. To some extent Northern India has dimilar values but in India these values are being challenged. In any case Western India and Southern India do not share those values. Nor do i believe Sri Lanka and Bangladesh share tgese values. So please do not make it about the subcontinent.
I grew up in Karachi and lived there on my own as a young woman for ten years. I drove everywhere on my own at all times of the day or night, shopped alone and worked in a hospital with men,and yet never felt as insecure or scared as I do now when I visit Karachi. In those days, young women still got jostled in the bazars, or were on the receiving end of lewd remarks occasionally but if confronted, the offenders actually looked ashamed, like they knew they had done something wrong. Two years ago I saw a mother attack two young teenagers, no more than 16, because they had touched her daughter while they were shopping. The boys were laughing as she hit them with her rubber slipper, as were the men in the crowd that had formed. Not one, including the policeman came to help her. She asked that they be arrested and was laughed at. The policeman laughingly sent the offenders on their way saying boys will be boys. There was a lot of laughter that day, no remorse, just laughter. No shame, just laughter. So what has changed since I lived there thirty years ago? Our males have lost all sense of shame and decency. They have all become "real men", men whose lives, and honor, revolve around the female body, around what it looks like, how young it is, who owns it, how to use and abuse it, its value as a bartering commodity and so on and so forth. How can women expect justice when the perpetrators, the ones handing out the justice and everyone in between are all real men? All of us in the subcontinent are morally dead. It is too late for resusitation. We are finally all corrupt morally and ethically but we should still rejoice. Our boys have become Real Men!!!!!
@1984: What you are stating undoubtedly is accurate representation of ow things WERE. After all, while Suryanelli came o media attention now, the qctual incident is 12 years old. Look at what has happened in Badaun rape case. The victims were poor and of a low caste. The rapists and the police wo failed o register the case were Yadav - the same caste that supports chief minister Akhilesh Yadav's party. Yet there has been national outrage. Akhilesh first suspended the 2 police but that was nit enough, now he has suspended the state home secretary but the matter is not dying down. Union Minister for Wmen's affair Maneka is talking about setting up rape crisis centers. I do not know what the listical issues that such a proposal may face but the issue is now not about just the specific cases but a more holistic response. Even in Delhi gang rape, people were not simply demanding punishment for rapists but rather change of an outdated law.
India is changing and women's safety issues will no lnger simply get platitudes or token responses. Media and cibil society have ensured that this has now become a political issue.
@x: I wished if we were as good as you said....But the truth is that the one factor linking both the Delhi Gangrape and Mumbai Shakti mills rape is that the rapists were all poor people with no political connections....
Situation is different when the perpetrators are rich and powerful.For eg
Ruchika Girotra case : The SP who molested her and then tortured his family when they complained driving her to suicide got 6 month suspended sentence with 10,000 fine
Suryanelli Case: The case which is so worst to even explain to u...The family hasnt got justice because one of them Kurein was a minsiter during Congress rule
Arushi Case : Case is going on for 5 years but still not ruled out if its Honor killing
There are so many cases which are pending in courts for decades or withdrawn becaise of pressure by the perpetrators and negligence by the authorities..
But we hope that day will come and happy that we are moving in positive direction even though we are inching towards it
@Silly Politics: Wake up and smell the coffee...
I see everyone showing statistics of the rapes in USA is very much higher than in Pakistan....But they bury their head in sand about the lack of law in our country
In USA,the rape victim is examined impartially,given counselling and if found guilty,the rapist is given proper punishment especially if the victim is minor,he had to register himself as a sex offender when he comes out..
In Pakistan,the first question people ask when a rape case happens,is What was the girl doing in that place??? Why was she outside home at time of the night?? What dress was she wearing???
Police,lawyers,judges,witnesses..Anyone can be bought and the girl who complained will become a pariah even if the rapist was convicted because people believe u r immoral as you r not a virgin anymore...
Let me not begin the statutory rapes we do in the name of marriage against minors....
The more I read you...........the more I like what you have to say. In my thinking Laws are enacted to check and punish crime and benefit society. Seeing crimes against women being committed with impunity, shows the failure of not only the lawmakers but the enforcers of the law as well. If society is allowed barbaric behaviour it will be labelled ' barbarik '..........the fact that this society is Muslim, is incidental. To equate this behaviour with Islam would be unfair.
Whereas the record of Pakistan in treating women is totally disgusting but "Pakistani men are possibly one of the most violent in the world today" is based on casual empiricism not on thorough or statistical research. Please present stats for other countries, then compare. Nevertheless, the society has to change and the question is how? Do you have thoughts on that? Urgently, the Govt must get seized of this problem and see if specif educational campaigns through town meetings and public meetings can help to transform the attitude that brings harm to women.
I'm surprised, none of the above commentators has yet called this author an Indian/CIA/RAW agent.
Less of religion and more of good education will teach people to be just and reasonable.
70 years down the lane, India has not fared any better either Sir. Shame on us.
Pls. Allow response to someone who has written to me.
@Mta: Did i blame Islam? No. I blamed the Muslims in Pakistan who have been led by their mullahs to believe that they. Will get heaven if they convert kafirs - even if the way to do so is by kidnapping a minor irl, raping her and forcily converting her.
Rape happens all over the world and they are individual acts of horror. Certainly they happen in India as well. But a rape for the express purpose of converting a kafir is certainly unique to Pakistan.
Also since you ask about the Delhi gangrape- her killers have been sentenced to death. Plus thousands came out o protest. That is the other difference- justice is denied to Rinkle Kumari and thousands of others like her and there is no outrage in either civil society or media.
I am totally agreed with writer Pakistani men are animals, they dont respect women, 90% Pakistani men dont love their wives, having wife they are always after other women, 98% Pakistani women love their husbands, being knowing they are after other women, but they wait, may be they return in normal way.. God bless Pakistani women
All said and done, many of the so called crimes against women in Pakistan such as honor killings, murder and seek absolution through blood money or forgiveness, rapist walking free, punishment by death for blasphemy are all in accordance with Islamic sharia law.
Since PAK is an islamic republic wherein the citizens are ordered to conduct their life according to sharia as stated in the constitution, many of the crimes enumerated here are sanctioned by the PAK constitution.
They all become crimes only under natural law or English common law. This is the conundrum PAK faces and hence even in educated circles the arguments fall short when sharia is invoked.
PAK cannot have two legal ethics and criminal laws based on divergent ethical principals. Since sharia cannot be amended and sunnah has to be followed in an islamic society as stated in the constitution, emancipation of women as per common law standards is not possible. There are several good aspects of sharia /Semitic laws which even the common law system adopted. However, the reverse adaptation into sharia is not possible, even though every Islamic society functions within the fringes of common law. However, in Pakistan the common law criminal system has been side stepped in the name of sharia and duality of justice system persists.
Emancipation of women in PAK-under what standards and ethics? The solution will come if PAK addresses this dilemma.
@Gp65: What about the criminals who gang raped a medical student in Delhi, or those who recently raped two Dalit girls in UP. This has nothing to do with religion, but attitutude and Stone Age customs prevalent in sub continent against women and the weak. Rape is associated with caste system, which is prevalent in Hindu religion that officially preaches two caste system, the high caste and low caste, not in any other religion.
@Sam: Nothing to do if men are educated or not. Few years ago Pakistani educated man running ethnic TV and Radio station in New York murdered his wife that was later termed "Honor" killing. On the contrary educated ones know ways to get out of prosecution.
This system will go on unless change is bought at the level of homes where men dominate and women become part of oppression on other women.Laws look good on paper but when the policeman who has to register the FIR, the lawyer who has to argue the case and the judge who has to issue an edict all think that women r subhuman and a mans property ,laws will fail.Legislature is full of these men who will not allow change using culture and religion as their shield.Pakistan needs leaders who have the guts to say that such religious/cultural interpretations r wrong and then have the moral courage to face fatwas of kufr.
Sad state. May be Pakistan should try encouraging secular education instead of Islamic studies and Pakistan studies!
Your last ara was brilliant. You forgot one crime of women though. Being born into the 'wrong' religion. The punishment for that crime is kidnap, rape and forcible conversion and then being discarded like a used rag doll.
Uneducated men across this planet continue to inflict inhumanity on women that would put the medieval world to shame.
Pakistani women are no less crook. They play bigger role to turn innocent children into barbarians. Not only they teach their sons to enforce strict rules on their wives, they are the ones who give opposite lessons to their daughters. End result is abuse, fights, divorces and murders. There is no balanced approach from anyone.
Truth is always bitter. Very shameful and disgusting but true to the core.