Power of listening

Though much has been written and talked about the power of talking, oration and speech, the importance of listening and being listened to often goes unattended. In today’s world which is excessively obsessed with speaking and self-expression, listening is increasingly becoming a forgotten art. Similarly, much has been debated and written about the potential promises listening holds in professional, educational, academic and intellectual domains. What often goes unnoticed is its potential therapeutic impact.

Agreed, it’s hard to manage time for listening in these busy, digitally obsessed, materialistic, and hyperinflationary times. However, as emotional, rational and social beings, we all crave connection and understanding. Listening fosters understanding, exposes us to other people’s perspectives and insights, and allows us to share empathy. More importantly, the one aspect of listening that remains largely untapped is its healing potential. While oration skills can strengthen social bonds, listening acts as the foundation upon which strong relationships are built.

Ironically, we readily dedicate significant time to talking but struggle to carve out even a little time for listening. The reluctance to listen stems from the misconception that it is passive and unimportant compared to speaking. This manifests itself, among other things, in weakening social bonds. The growing divides in social relationships often stem from a lack of communication. Also, misunderstandings, a reluctance to listen to another’s perspective, an overemphasis on talking and self-righteousness fueled by intolerance wedge the social circle. Many people end their lives because they fail to get their grievances heard and their existence acknowledged.

Therefore, engaged listening isn’t just about hearing words; it’s about creating a safe space for someone to be heard and understood. This act of genuine attentiveness can be a catalyst for healing and growth. Imagine someone grappling with deep emotional distress, distrust and psychological turmoil. When they encounter a listener who’s fully present, non-judgmental and focused on comprehending their experience, a wave of relief washes over them. Simply being heard validates their emotions and allows them to navigate their struggles. This creates a foundation of trust — the cornerstone of any therapeutic journey.

By truly listening to others, we impact both ourselves and the speaker. They offer us more than just words; they share their trust, a precious portion of their time, and, most importantly, the expectation that their voice will be heard. This attentive engagement holds immense therapeutic potential. It not only helps heal emotional and psychological wounds but also builds bridges of empathy, humanism and compassion.

Therapeutic listening is more than just passive absorption of information; it’s about active engagement. Therapists use techniques like reflective listening, paraphrasing and summarising what they hear. This ensures clarity, encourages deeper exploration and creates a safe space for the person to explore their thoughts and feelings. This back-and-forth process can even help them uncover hidden patterns or emotions they weren’t aware of. The power of listening extends beyond therapy. Anyone who truly listens with the intent to understand can create a space for healing and growth.

The therapeutic power of listening goes beyond emotional well-being. Studies suggest active listening can even lower stress hormones, promoting feelings of calm. This creates a positive feedback loop; the sense of safety and encouragement fosters a more optimistic outlook. By truly listening to friends, family or even strangers facing challenges, we can offer them a form of emotional support that can be incredibly healing. Simply feeling heard and understood can provide a sense of validation and belonging, which in turn fosters peace of mind for both the speaker and the listener.

Therefore, cultivating a habit of listening and getting listened to can create a ripple effect of healing in our own lives and the lives of those around us. In a world that often feels isolating, the gift of a listening ear can be a powerful tool for fostering connection, understanding, and ultimately, the emotional well-being of humanity.

Published in The Express Tribune, May 12^th, 2024.

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