Women can’t be trusted

Published: June 19, 2011

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Those western-imperialist-baby-eating-drone-flying-war-mongers are at it again. Tarnishing the image of this noble and pure nation of ours. Don’t they know that their propaganda cannot work here? That all their vile and blatant attempts are doomed to failure? Has no one told them that all Pakistani’s are born with a thin layer of an anti-Pakistan narrative filtering gauze over our ears that only thickens with time? Haven’t they heard that we Pakistanis cannot be anything but shining paragons of humanly virtue because we put “Islamic” in the full title of our country? Clearly not. How else can one justify the base lies and vile falsehoods in this latest report independently published by the Thompson Reuters Foundation. The clear work of a group of Jewish bankers sitting in the basement of the Bilderberg headquarters while taking time out from scuffing the shoes of their Hindu-Illuminatis masters, the report alleges that Pakistan is the third most dangerous country for women.

Surely the claims that 1,000 women and girls are victims of honour killings every year and that 90 per cent of Pakistani women suffer domestic abuse are pure fantasy fiction. No doubt, they were paid off by India to say this, although not paid enough to prevent India from appearing one spot below us on that same list. Besides, have you ever seen American television? The women wear the kind of clothes that should be relegated to lurid descriptions by maulvis who are trying to inspire the next batch of suicide bombers. At least we don’t let our women dress like that! That has to count for something?

Personally, I blame the media. If they hadn’t been highlighting every rape and honour killing, we wouldn’t look so bad. The journalist community is using disgusting things like ‘truth’ and ‘reportage’ to show the world a side of us that is really not that helpful. If they only focused on digging up those positive stories about how we hate negative stories, things wouldn’t be so bad.

I also blame the women. They complain too loudly after being raped and murdered. Why do they need to shine the spotlight on injustice by taking their story to the rest of the world. Don’t they know this affects the rest of Pakistan badly? That it lowers our morale? All women are clearly Hindu-Zionist-Islam-hating spies of the CIA.

It is for these reasons that we are proud to say that the ‘report’ and all its ‘findings’ will be completely ignored here in Pakistan. Us Pakistanis are wise to your demoralising trickery and shall not let these attempts to ruin our honour go unanswered. After all, it’s for that same fragile honour that we have been forced to kill so many innocent women. What is a life when considered against something so intangible and misguided? Sure, in some cultures, honour is actually increased by treating women well and respecting their rights and freedoms. But those cultures are full of Jews. Any good Pakistani knows that a woman cannot be trusted with freedom, rights and life. That is why we Pakistani men take this heavy burden upon ourselves. To not even be thanked for so tirelessly murdering and raping is just rude. If you don’t believe us, ask our women. Once we beat them enough that they give you the answer we want them to.

So please don’t expect these researches to have any effect on the way women are treated in Pakistan. It is for their own good and besides it’s all the media’s fault. Just ask any man. Unless he’s a Christian or Ahmadi. They aren’t to be trusted either. In fact, just stop paying attention to us altogether. Just leave us alone, in the dark.

Published in The Express Tribune, June 19th, 2011.

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Reader Comments (47)

  • Rehan
    Jun 19, 2011 - 1:26AM

    But, what about my sandwich? :'(Recommend

  • faraz
    Jun 19, 2011 - 1:29AM

    The “great warrior nations”, Pakistan and India, are at ranked 3 and 4 after Afghanistan and Congo. What a shame!Recommend

  • Jun 19, 2011 - 1:42AM

    Well written and too the point! We need to expose all these people who do not agree with our assorted jahil mullahs! Not jahil i mean learned and versed mullahs! in fact its time we replaced Islam as the formal religion and instead have the religion of Mullahism!Recommend

  • Talha
    Jun 19, 2011 - 2:15AM

    Women should be declared Non-Muslims by the Government of Pakistan and hence forth deemed Wajib-ul-Qatal.

    This is in the best interest of this nation and the wider Ummah.


  • Leila Rage
    Jun 19, 2011 - 2:32AM

    Sami Shah your sarcastic pieces are always a delight to read! Thank you, thank you, thank you—-for speaking out. It is honestly a tragedy that reports like this one are ignored, and that our people are in such a deep state of denial that everything is a conspiracy of some sort in their twisted minds. People believe these conspiracy theories so deeply that they aren’t even willing to listen, or to see the obvious reality in front of them. The women of Pakistan have suffered so much for so long, and we’ve protested and protested in anyway we can but who listens? Either people are too scared to do something because they fear being killed off by crazy chauvanists/so called “extremists”, or they are just sick of meeting with failure every time they try and so now have become indifferent. Its pathetic to think how many nationwide strikes and protests and marches were carried out for our wretched judiciary, and yet when it comes to the women of Pakistan nobody gives a damn; they can’t afford to stand in the sun for hours protesting after all the fairness creams they’ve got slathered on…Why doesnt every single woman feel her blood boil when she reads such reports? Why don’t ALL the women of Pakistan go on strike simultaneously, and lead a revolt through the entire nation, until something substantial is done? Why do we shut up and forget about these issues? Recommend

  • Arslan
    Jun 19, 2011 - 2:33AM

    Another ethno-masochistic, falsely liberal, nearly-intellectual and unconvincingly sarcastic writing piece which fails to understand the mere argumentative basics of some legitimate criticisms: in which way 90% of the women (oh, I was told that it was ‘80% of the households‘) are suffering from domestic violence ? More importantly, how do you people define domestic violence ? And in which way women are worst treated in India-Pakistan than – say – Saudi Arabia ? Reading some peoples, it’s like Pakistani men are women-boxing sadists and ask the princess the right to have some of their oxygen. That’s how you show it, so don’t go in a self-pitiful rantRecommend

  • Ilmana Fasih
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:15AM

    Yes the key word…leave us in the dark….and let us sleep deep, undisturbed. Kudos.Recommend

  • A. Faiz
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:17AM

    Latest trend: If you can’t come up with solutions or offer any constructive criticism/advice, use sarcasm and revel in bashing your country :) Makes you look very intelligent.Recommend

  • Jun 19, 2011 - 3:36AM

    This is a ploy by CIA/RAW/MOSSAD to discourage foreign women to come to PakistanRecommend

  • Akthar
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:37AM

    Shame on us. South Asia seems to the worst. Afghanistan, India & Pakistan are all lumped together! :(Recommend

  • reader
    Jun 19, 2011 - 4:00AM

    haha .. i like your sarcasm.. i agree with where your going, but i don’t completely agree with the report.. where did SAUDI ARABIA go? are women free there?.. i believe we live in a mix society.. we have different segments women ill-treated by that anti-jewish ghairat brigade is a segment of our society..i come from a different segment which is very different from the segment in which u belong. anyhow maybe that filtering gauze over my ears has started thickening already! .. but nonetheless i like the article! Recommend

  • Jun 19, 2011 - 4:14AM

    Yes, we should restrain “our” women. Look at KSA! Women have the audacity to demand the “privilege” to drive! Defaming Islam! Recommend

  • prashanth
    Jun 19, 2011 - 5:09AM

    You should have added India to it. There is not much to chose between third and fourth, is there?Recommend

  • Anup
    Jun 19, 2011 - 10:40AM

    Well written. Women status is bad, but 3rd position is still better than Afghanistan, which has number one and Congo nr two. India is not far behind at number 4.Recommend

  • Mehreen
    Jun 19, 2011 - 11:19AM

    Smug, one-sided and unfair, this kind if rhetoric is almost cliché in Express Tribune blogs/articles now. Recommend

  • indian guy
    Jun 19, 2011 - 11:59AM

    @ chota chetan,

    why do u need foreign women? Are pakistani women not enough for u?Recommend

  • Mr. Liberal
    Jun 19, 2011 - 1:09PM


    “Another ethno-masochistic, falsely liberal, nearly-intellectual and unconvincingly sarcastic”

    What is “false” about the purported liberalism? When did he talk about ethnicity (last time I checked, “Pakistani” doesn’t constitute an ethnie). And how was it “masochistic” if he never made I-statements? And how is the irony unconvincing (are you asserting he’s just pretending to be sarcastic?)?

    “in which way 90% of the women (oh, I was told that it was ’80% of the households‘) are suffering from domestic violence ? More importantly, how do you people define domestic violence?”

    Perhaps you can actually look at the reports and then cite them, if you have valid critiques. (Estimates range from 75-90% of women are abused. As per the definition of domestic abuse, you can start here: http://www1.umn.edu/humanrts/instree/e4devw.htm). Why a satirist should go into a long lecture on social science research is beyond me, but if you’re genuinely interested, I suggest you take a course in statistics and field research. There you will learn the basics of research methods, operational definitions, peer review, and other issues already dealt with by credible social scientists.

    “And in which way women are worst treated in India-Pakistan than – say – Saudi Arabia?”

    Saudi Arabia is a pathetic standard, if that’s your benchmark. Funny you should bring that up – the Islamization programs in Pakistan have been modeled on that country, which has successfully instilled a Salafi mindset in the current generation of Muslims in Pakistan, and has alienated them from their South Asian roots.

    It’s seems with this rant that you have basically proved his point. The problem here is that when Pakistanis are presented with serious, deep structural problems in their society (such as the state of half their population) rather than waking up and vowing to change it, for the good of their own people, they spend their energy nursing their wounded national pride. Apparently, in this culture, honor and image (even if it means lying about how good you are) is more important than how you actually treat other human beings. Recommend

  • Observer from London
    Jun 19, 2011 - 1:19PM

    Excellent satire.
    Thought provoking as well.Recommend

  • Faraz Talat
    Jun 19, 2011 - 2:26PM

    Brilliantly put..
    I wrote an article on the same subject a few days back (“Pakistan Hates Women”). It was..um..fascinating to see so many people flatly denying the statistics presented by TRF, and earlier PIMS, on abuse of women in Pakistan. They simple cannot believe (or just don’t want to) that our country is not a very nice place for women.
    Interestingly, one person commented that I should go live in the West where “men and women dance naked in the roads”. (facepalm)Recommend

  • Shamy
    Jun 19, 2011 - 2:54PM

    err….Mubashir Luqman mite take this seriously….Recommend

  • Malay
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:04PM

    ha! ha! Ha! excellent pieceRecommend

  • Rahat U
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:29PM

    This piece wasn’t sarcastic. Of course the writer tried to be sarcastic, but sarcasm should have a premise, just saying the opposite is not sarcasm. Recommend

  • Rahat U
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:30PM

    I say this with all sincerity, stop writing Sami Shah, please.Recommend

  • fouzia
    Jun 19, 2011 - 3:32PM

    Ha ha ha Read the following line from the above article:
    “I also blame the women. They complain too loudly after being raped and murdered”

    Surely every woman makes a lot of noise after her MURDER! Recommend

  • Rehan
    Jun 19, 2011 - 4:25PM

    I cannot even carry on normal conversations with Pakistanis any more because I am sick of their conspiracy mindset. They are beyond deluded, they have collectively gone insane. I have never seen a group of people in such denial. They attribute everything to external forces, as if our country is this innocent bystander. I’m tired of defending Pakistan, we are indefensible and let’s just hope we don’t end up in a civil war, in case we aren’t already in one.Recommend

  • Jun 19, 2011 - 4:33PM

    Sami, I often have differing views than you.However, this time I agree with this piece 100%. And the answer to it is … yes you guessed it correct! The answer is Islam. We drop the pretense of being Muslims and actually start following Islam. Islam came to liberate women and provide them equity. Unfortunately, we only provide ritualistic lip service to our religion and not follow it completely.

    May Allah guide us. Aameen.

    Aly Balagamwala
    Associate, MuslimMatters.org

    Twitter | FacebookRecommend

  • Jun 19, 2011 - 4:43PM

    OUCH Sami Shah! that is all i can say!Recommend

  • Malik
    Jun 19, 2011 - 6:02PM

    Sami you’re going to get your editor in trouble with Lucman again.Recommend

  • indian guy
    Jun 19, 2011 - 6:06PM

    dear all

    PL take the poll seriously. I think Pakistan at 3 and India at 4 (afghanistan at 1)should be treated as a shame for the sub-continent. Pakistan and Afghanistan mainly for the reason that there are too many honour killings and India purely due to female fotecide. Both are shameful practices. Islam i am told respects and demands respect for women and Hinduism treats female child equivalent to “Godess Lakshmi’. Both noble intentions but results being zero. These polls are for our nations to open our eyes and behave more like humans.

    It is shameful, even Somalia and Saudi Arabia gain better ratings than us based on our prejuidices. Its just a question of who is more badder.

    p.s: at least my pakistani friends should not say India/RAW is behind all these goofy ratings polls.Recommend

  • Sarah
    Jun 19, 2011 - 7:01PM

    There is a difference between 80% households and 90% women.I agree with all you say about our mindsets but seriously, this 90% is not correct.And pray tell me,how can a nation of 1.25 billion people rank lower than us?Their figures have to be higher than us by default.Female feoticide and infanticide (yes,these are 2 separate forms of killings),widow burning,beheading of alleged witches,inhuman treatment of women (and men) from ‘lower classes,rape of girls serving in temples and ashrams and sexual slavery are exclusive to India and are being carried out in huge numbers but are not reported fully or highlighted in their media coz they believe in presenting a rosy picture of their country which we thankfully don’t.This is not a typical anti India rant,it’s the truth.As I said, a country of 1.25 billion people with severe class and religious divides would have more problems and issues than a country of 180 million by default.Recommend

  • Shazia Nawaz
    Jun 19, 2011 - 7:34PM

    Wonderfully written!Recommend

  • Hedgefunder
    Jun 19, 2011 - 9:09PM

    What is it with Pakistani men and their attitude towards women?
    In Uk, their have been several trails where pakistani origin man in their 20s have been convicted of Grooming young english girls for sex and plying them with drugs and alcohol!!!
    They operate near schools and impress the young girls with their cars, mobiles, drugs etc!!!
    They have all been convicted and handed very heavy sentences too, and it does nothing to enhance race relations within their local communities either!!!!
    At least in UK our legal system works, unlike Pakistan!!!!Recommend

  • ashwin
    Jun 19, 2011 - 9:16PM

    Reading your piece on a Sunday night is the best pudding one can have after a having a heavy dinner, thank you. Recommend

  • a
    Jun 19, 2011 - 10:02PM

    Women cry very loud after being raped and murdered!!!…..! Might be Indians r one spot less than pak…but i dont think any will dare to speak like you… Recommend

  • raheela
    Jun 19, 2011 - 10:23PM

    i have only three words for this article : owesome owesome owesome.just loved it each and every word,well done writter you spoke my heart:-Recommend

  • Pradeep
    Jun 19, 2011 - 11:40PM

    @Sarah – is that really the only insight you could gain from the article? sad.

    Anyway I as an Indian am truly ashamed of this ignominy. All this is happening despite what could be termed as a female-biased “domestic abuse” laws here in India. Indicates a mile gap between law and its execution.

    However the Indian Penal Code needs more stringent anti-rape and anti-harassment laws.Recommend

  • Asad
    Jun 20, 2011 - 12:26AM

    Like your sarcasm but can you spare me from referring to dictionary again and again for the heavy-weight words u useRecommend

  • Abdul Ahad Ayub
    Jun 20, 2011 - 12:31AM

    90 %?

    According to that, nearly 9 million of Karachi’s 10 million women must be subject to domestic abuse.
    thora sa zyada hogayaRecommend

  • Dodo
    Jun 20, 2011 - 7:54PM

    Abdul Ahad Ayub bhai, not all of those 10million people are women, are they? There are Men in there somewhere I reckon. Recommend

  • Jun 21, 2011 - 1:35PM

    @Leila Rage: BTW did you know, Women in Kenya went on a week long sex strike in 2009 ?Recommend

  • Hedgefunder
    Jun 21, 2011 - 5:02PM

    @Rehan Afzal:
    Yes ! But if that happened in Pakistan, then you will have a Mass Murder on basis of Honour!!!! Consider that for Fact!!Recommend

  • Syed
    Jun 21, 2011 - 8:15PM

    Welcome to the world of Extremism, dont get happy you are also one of them.
    By putting absurd blames on others, you are trying to clear them off from their wrong doings. Entirely pathetic article, you are worse of then the people you are trying to criticize !Recommend

  • Gina
    Jun 22, 2011 - 2:24AM

    I am sure the USA would LOVE to take back their $4billion a year they give to Pakistan. Stop complaining about the US…they care more about the country than the actual People of Pakistan do. Where did all that money go? The electricity is off for 10 hours a day in some cities…..disgusting. The literacy rate for women is only 35%???? Spend those US DOLLARS on education and infrastructure…follow Turkey as an example. Recommend

  • Umaara
    Jun 22, 2011 - 4:26AM

    Excellent satire!! Laughed out loud. I’m sharing it!Recommend

  • Nobody
    Jun 22, 2011 - 12:20PM

    $4 billion a year? Bit of a stretch, it’s been around $18-$20bil over the course of around 10 years. Please take those rose colored glasses off honey. Not everything is black and white as much as we may wish it to be. The PEOPLE of Pakistan have no say or contol in where that $$ goes, the government does and they pocket most of it without any regard or concern for their own country (duh). Were it in the hands of the common people, plagued with problems such as lack of electricity on a daily basis, perhaps it would go where it’s needed. And I’m still LOLing at your statement claiming the US cares more about Pakistan than Pakistanis do. If terrorism hadn’t banged on our (USA’s) frontdoor on 9/11, the US wouldn’t give a damn about Pakistan or its problems. How naive of you. Recommend

  • Babur Chughtai
    Jun 23, 2011 - 4:21PM

    India has the largest statistics of honor killings, rapes, female infanticide and female underage marriages according to UN figures. Pakistanis are kind, generous and hospitable people,; leaderships that came from the same sick anti-Paksitan mindset like this burger chamcha. Recommend

  • Jun 23, 2011 - 10:00PM

    Indeed Pakistan is heaven on earth for women….Recommend

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