A state of nothing

Not for nothing is something better than nothing. Except when the nothingness of something can weigh more than something itself.

It is this weight of nothingness that seems to be weighing down the new government as it struggles to add up to something. But this something takes time to add up to its something-ness. Time is also what it takes to shape something out of nothing, or perhaps shape nothing into a fresh-shaped nothing. There may yet be something to this new nothing but the sheer magnitude of nothingness will — like a giant yawning black hole — suck in something till it dissolves into nothing.



Which is what we are being dished out at press conferences every day. Nothing dressed as something is laid out in front of cameras like expensive cutlery and then removed before something can be served steaming hot. How can something be served when there is nothing to serve yet? But nobody likes the sight of an empty table. Something is, as they say, better than nothing. Except when it is not.

It is not when nothing translates into a lack of substance which in turn translates into lack of blunders. Nothing means no mistakes. No mistakes mean no criticism. No criticism means lack of bad work. Lack of bad work could be translated as good work. A full circle of nothing is definitely better than a flatlined something. Underestimate the power of circular logic at your own peril.

This then is an ode to nothing, sung to the tune of nothing to celebrate the goodness of nothing. The sacrifice of giving up First Class travel only to opt for rigours of Business Class is nothing. And nothing is good.

The cerebral exercise of trying to decide how many litres of tea and how many tonnes of biscuits should replace how many gallons of coffee and how many pounds of sandwiches in government offices is nothing. And nothing is good.

The valiant and courageous decision to place two people on Exit Control List when they are already in jail serving a 10 and seven years’ sentence is nothing. And nothing is good.

So with so much of nothing floating around, it’s but natural that a whole lot of nothing has snuck its way on to the media. The crushing burden of such nothingness is weighing down the front pages of newspapers like never before. The silent and empty roar of such nothingness is echoing across TV screens like never before. The glorious fickleness of such nothingness is snaking its way across ‘Likes’ and ‘Shares’ on the social media like never before.

#Nothing is trending like nothing ever has.

But that’s nothing to worry about. Nothing much ever came out of worrying about nothing. Come to think of it, worrying is overrated in Naya Pakistan. Why worry when nothing can stop us now? Why worry when nothing can scare us now? Why worry when nothing can slow us now? The bumpy but oh-so-delectable ride from yesterday’s nothing to tomorrow’s nothing is nothing but a lesson in self-ascension. Like Jon Snow, you know nothing if you do not know this. Even if you know, do you really feel it?



Is that nothing that gladdens your heart so since the dawn of the new era? Is that nothing that curls your lips into a smile? Is that nothing that makes joy drip down from your face like sweat off Ronaldo’s brow? Nothing does that to you.

And it does that to you with gusto if you are as hapless an Opposition as the one we have today — combined or not. Look at this shell-shocked bunch hoofing up to the mountains to find a consensus candidate to run against Dr Arif Alvi for the Highest Office in the land. Look at them nibble at crumbs while forgetting about that chunk of meat called RTS. Look at them spar with gigantic egos while ignoring the fact that their combined might is amounting to a whole lot of nothing in terms of public discourse. They have nothing to play with.

So we wait for the weave of nothing to blend into the fabric of something. This new blend of tapestry may unfurl itself once decisions mutate into policy which metamorphoses into action. The new government may be on to something, but that something is as yet a sum total of intentions wedded to pious words. The palate of the electorate is craving for something it can sink its teeth into.

Till that happens, we are all swimming — or drowning — in a vast sea of nothingness. And thank God for that. It is a state of being that has released us from the clutches of the past and is shielding us from the cold curling fingers of the future. But it is a temporary state of being which may momentarily vanish with the first crash, clang and bang of a controversy. That’s when the fatigued news cycle — currently running on fumes of nothing — will groan back to life and find traction on the rough tarmac of this scandal, that scandal, any scandal.

But for now, float on the gentle waves of this sea of nothingness and look up at the clear starry sky that glitters with distant possibilities that may yet escape the black holes of unfulfilled promises. There will be a time for yearning and apathy, but that time is not now. There will be a time for hope and despair, but that time is not now. There will be a time for triumph and disappointment, but that time is not now.

For now, lie back and gaze into the eyes of nothing. And let something stare back.

Published in The Express Tribune, August 26^th, 2018.

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