I hope you're fine. I am a 24-year-old girl and have fallen in love with my Facebook friend who I've never met. He's Pakistani but currently lives in a foreign country. He says he loves me too but wants me to send him nude pictures and insists we shouldn't have any privacy between us. I belong to a religious family and don't find this act appropriate. I'm confused whether he truly loves me or is this lust and a temporary feeling? What do you suggest I do? Kindly help me out.
Dear Confused Lover,
Please DO NOT send him (or anyone else for that matter) your nude pictures. You'll live to regret it if you do that.
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He doesn't love you – or for that matter even respect you. He’s simply lusting after you. And yes his feelings towards you are temporary.
You're being very naïve if you believe this person truly loves you and wants your nude pictures only because he wants to have no privacy between you two. That’s absolute nonsense. He only wants your pictures because of lust. Most probably he will use them for sinful purposes. And being the type of person he seems, he most probably might pass them on to his friends and/or post them on the Internet for all to see.
Another thing that he can do is to use your nude pictures to blackmail you – for money or sexual favours. And once that starts, it won’t ever end. The more you will give in to him believing that it will be over soon, the more he will demand. It’s a vicious circle that will never ever end.
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You are being deceived by this person. I don’t believe he has any serious intention of formalising your relationship, ie to getting engaged to you or marrying you. Most probably, you're just a way for him to get cheap thrills and pass time over the Internet.
I would strongly suggest that you cut off all ties with him immediately. Stop communicating with him and block him from everywhere that he can reach you from. It'll be tough initially because you love him but please believe me when I say it’s in your best interest.
Hopefully soon you will come across someone who not only loves you but also respects you and your modesty and who wouldn’t dream of breaching it in an inappropriate way.
All the best!
Asad is a counsellor, life coach, inspirational speaker and a personal-development expert. He advises on social, personal and emotional issues. You can send him your questions for this weekly column at [email protected] with “Ask Asad” mentioned in the subject line and provide as many details as possible.
Note: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Express Tribune.
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