10 things I hate about shopping

The aimlessly wandering people. While I have no beef with window shoppers, I hate it when they block the way.

1.    The bargaining. One thing I love about malls and high end boutiques are the fixed prices. Nobody ever thinks of arguing there but in the markets it’s a completely different story. Sometimes I feel like I’m a lawyer in some court, continuously giving justifications as to why I am right. The judge and the defender, however, happen to be the same person aka the shopkeeper.

2.   Association with girls. For the umpteenth time, not all girls are born shopaholics. Some of us are just as dumb when it comes to shopping as boys are.

3.    The parking. There is never and I repeat NEVER enough parking space the day you choose to go shopping.  Yes, there have been several tickets and even a few tow-truck related incidents.

4.    The aimlessly wandering people. While I have no beef with window shoppers, I hate it when they block the way. There should be a traffic rule for these situations.

5.    The ogling. There have been very few times when one can actually make a trip to the mall and escape this. Boys will be boys but what the heck is up with the staring girls? I never can tell whether it’s admiration or hatred. What’s that? You think its appreciation? What are you, mad?

6.   The so-called sales. Honestly, just stop with the ‘up to 70% off’ nonsense. The clothes on sale are not even worth looking at. And the stuff you really want is usually not even included in the sale. But of course, it is well known that if you hang a few sale banners, the women will automatically come.

7.    Running out of money. You know how sometimes in a hurry we don’t bother taking much cash on the way to shopping because we usually plan on buying this one thing and then rushing out? It always happens that when something really catches your fancy you don’t have enough money. And of course it’s the last piece available too.

8.    What you’re looking for is never there. Most of us usually have an idea of what we want to buy, and when we don’t see it, we usually end up wandering from shop to shop until finally — yes, you guessed it! We go home empty handed!

9.    The regret. Have you ever not bought something you really liked and then obsessed over it for hours at home?

10.   It’s tiring. So very tiring. You step out with just a few things in mind but soon enough one thing leads to another and before you know it, you have your hands full of bags, credit down to half and severe lower back pain.

Published in The Express Tribune, Sunday Magazine, March 4^th, 2012.