Raising matriarchs in Pakistani society

I belong to one such household — in terms of extended family


Saadia Qamar May 29, 2015

How often do you hear Pakistan is a patriarchal society? So many times that you lose count. On the other hand, where Pakistani matriarchs rule a household, that house is bound on principles of love, give and take, sharing and caring, with some minute quarrels in between, but more often faring on a better road.

I belong to one such household — in terms of extended family.

Matriarchs have played a pivotal role in my upbringing, so much so that I relied more on my nani, dadi and ammi, than anyone when it came to precise decision-making. The love and fondness I shared for them still grows in my heart.

Contrary to this, Pakistani society leaves most of their decision-making in the hands of men. Men may think twice as much as a women and experience less of a heartache when dealing with emotional matters, as they rely on their heads too often for all the decision-making power. A woman’s heart is made of gold; therefore her perspective, reason and decisions regarding all matters are determined by her pounding heart. Men’s decisions often lead to increased bloodshed and warfare. This can be seen happening all over the world. A woman, when she tackles a situation, creates love and shares abundance of it with the rest.

Also, the terminology with which men rule is to dictate and be the uncrowned kings of doom; women on the other hand, rule via love, compassion and sacrifice. They say it certainly takes a village to rear a child, and the mother plays the most significant role in society to rear the best of the offspring. Let’s give voice more often to the matriarchs in society, for those unheard voices can claim rightful ownership, and peace may take a solid place in our world.

Published in The Express Tribune, May 29th, 2015.

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