Unreasonable expectations of Asian parents

It is my request especially to parents to stop being so harsh on their children for failing to get perfect results

Being a Pakistani myself, I have observed parents being worried about the career of their children even before they are born. The litmus test for a child’s success is whether or not he/she has graduated from an elite university with a first class degree.

Unfortunately, children get so pressurised to do well in their studies that they internalise their achievement in terms of the grades they get or the offers they receive from different universities. While there is nothing wrong to give your best attempt as a student, however, it should not come at a cost of incurring huge loans or sacrificing personal health. Often, in the race to acquire the best possible degree, many students suffer from low self-esteem if they fail to get into their preferred college or university.

In my view, parents should not force their own choices upon children or make comparisons with others. The problem is that we usually compare the visible happiness of others with our inner sadness. No one ever puts a Facebook status of the number of universities they get rejections from but as soon as they get a single offer, there is an urgent desire to boast about it to others.

It’s time people realise that there are a lot of things to be rejoiced for other than top qualifications. Ultimately, it all boils down to what use the person makes out of his/her degree. It is not necessary that a lawyer has to end up practicing law or a doctor has to work at a hospital. In many cases, the skills acquired from these subjects can be very well utilised in other professions.

Moreover, I feel that employers must not limit the eligibility criteria to particular qualifications, unless it is absolutely necessary. It is very likely that a person who may do well as a student might not turn out to be a very good employee due to poor work ethics or lack of motivation. Everyone deserves a chance, even those without degrees. Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs and Bill Gates are brilliant examples of billionaires who dropped out of college to pursue their dreams.

One can argue that a person who has spent day and night studying to have a decent standard of living deserves to be preferred and it certainly is a valid argument. Nonetheless, there are a lot of people who lack resources to get admission in expensive universities even though they deserve it because of their brilliant results.

It is my sincere request especially to parents to stop being so harsh on their children for failing to get perfect results despite their maximum efforts.

Published in The Express Tribune, May 12^th, 2015.