The art of the grotesque

A friend, regularly aghast at the happenings that surround us, has a habit of opening up sentences with “can you believe it ...?”.  At that point he is stopped and informed that whatever he has to say relating to the Islamic Republic of Pakistan, however outrageous or bizarre — is fully believable; there is no problem at all in accepting whatever as a fact of Pakistani life.

It has become impossible to ‘shock’ the sane by recounting the sayings or doings of the various leaderships we suffer, whether dressed in khaki or any other colour. Politics in Pakistan is not, as has been defined, the art of the possible. It is the art of the grotesque.

Neither shocked nor startled were we (it is presumed) by the prime ministerial statement made in Lahore (where he so often weekends) on October 24 by Yousaf Raza Gilani that all talk of corruption in his government is mere “allegations and wrong perceptions.”  We may, possibly, have been rather put out by the sheer chutzpah of the man. And, oh yes, he even said that anyone having proof of corruption can go to the courts. Now, a long time ago, on one of the famous ‘tawk shows’ that entertain the awam but rarely inform, a well-known character in the column-writing world, when questioned on the lack of proof of corruption in the 1990s, correctly remarked that “robbers and thieves do not issue receipts.”

The prime minister would have done better to have avoided any mention of corruption in his government, he himself being loaded with question marks, his wife being weightily loaded and the remainder of his family being far from out in the clear. As to his government, allegations and perceptions are glaringly obvious. The latest Transparency International report has it that corruption in Pakistan this past year has leapt forward — there has at least been progress on one front. And, looking back, we find that Pakistan at its most corrupt was under the PPP government of 1996.

The PPP-Z is fast catching up and the perceptions are spread world-wide. Who can blame the people of donor countries, from whom aid is sought, when they say that no national of theirs should give a single penny to Pakistan, that the rich in Pakistan pay no taxes, and that every penny given is a penny saved by a Pakistani billionaire, who has gamed the system to dip into the national till and that if they support this corrupt country, they are stupid.

Even more chutzpah was added to the art of the grotesque when we read and heard that the PPP-Z in the form of Monticello Doctor Babar Awan, who incredibly hangs on to the law portfolio, was dispatched to play footsie with the Q-League, that bunch of renegades and runners from various parties who leapt on to the Musharraf gravy train. The chosen representative with whom Awan parleyed was a man who acted as Musharraf’s little finger in the disgraceful government of 2002-2007. Since the Awan link to the PPP-Z party co-chairman, who doubles as the country’s head of state is akin to that of Pervez Elahi and Musharraf, we must assume that the move was instigated from the top.

The president has proved himself to be a pretty shrewd card sharpener, street-wise as he is. What could be his motive in making advances to the remnants of a regime so discredited, led by a man he manoeuvred expertly to displace and then replace? Of course, two parties can disagree on every major issue and scrap like scorpions when they both wish to occupy the same space. But since Zardari is in the space he wishes to be, does he need the Q lot?  Is he contemplating an off-load?

Published in The Express Tribune, October 30^th, 2010.