9 signs your boss maybe an Ursula

We all know the tentacled sea-witch from The Little Mermaid who manipulates a naive Ariel into trading her soul for a stab at realising her dreams.

Sadly, the corporate world is teeming with villainous female bosses who literally act like witches at the workplace. That’s not to say that all female bosses are Ursulas, but only God can save you from the wrath, pettiness and extremely competitive nature of the ones who are.

Indent here are some tell-tale signs that your boss may be an Ursula who thinks your soul is fair trade for your corporate ambitions.

1- Does she think she’s queen bee?

An Ursula always assumes that everything she says, hears and feels is correct. If you dare to argue or disagree, the monster in her awakens to immediately embarrass and insult you in front of all your colleagues.

2- Does she have raging hormones?

Dealing with your own PMS is hard enough as it is but if you add Ursula’s time of the month to the mix, you’ll have female employees jumping off buildings and slitting their wrists.

3- Does she ever train, mentor or guide new female employees?

An Ursula doesn’t want to make a conducive environment for the career growth of her female employees — especially those who are possibly more talented than her. Her only feedback is to make underhanded critical remarks and pass passive-aggressive comments.

4- Is she easily threatened?

It’s hard for a woman to get to the top in a male-dominated organisation, but Ursulas will defend their territory like vicious predators. And the slightest challenge to her authority will make her rage like a monster. 

5- Does she micromanage everything?

Working with people who sweat over the small stuff is hard enough, but a typical Ursula will have an angina attack if you show too much initiative or come up with an idea that she hasn’t already come up with.

6- Do you ever find her spying on you?

As women, we’re pretty much all by nature extremely curious creatures, but when someone constantly has their huge eyeballs on your screen, it makes you want to scream, “Either get yourself a life or at least make your spying a little less obvious.”

7- Does she treat people according to status, social background and position?

Ursulas tend to speak to some people in a tone best suited for scum, but the condescending drawl immediately changes to a super-achingly-sweet squeak when somebody higher-up on the career ladder turns up.

8- Does she ache for friends?

Despite her constant rage, Ursulas often force their employees to go out for group breakfasts and lunches, even though no one really wants to socialise with them outside the workplace. And when it’s time to pay the bill, she never ever offers to treat the team.

9- Does she lack empathy?

An Ursula doesn’t understand the concept of sisterhood, women supporting each other, having their backs, or listening to each others’ problems. Sociopathic Ursulas of the corporate world intentionally remain clueless to human emotions and often show signs of extreme insensitivity and inconsideration to their female counterparts. And most Ursulas tend to get away with it all.

Published in The Express Tribune, Ms T, September 2^nd, 2012.