Juggan Kazim reflects on father's murder, says it was the most frightening time in her life

Actor and television host Juggan Kazim has described her father's murder as the most frightening period of her life, revealing that although they never had a close relationship, she had hoped they would one day become best friends.

Appearing on a recent podcast, Kazim reflected on losing her father at the age of 21, the complicated nature of their relationship, and the lasting influence of the women who raised her. She also spoke about blended families, co-parenting and the importance of normalising second marriages.

Recalling the day she learned of her father's death, Kazim said she was in New York when she received a phone call in the middle of the night.

"I was sleeping in New York at the time. My phone rang, and I don't even remember who it was. The person said, 'Dada has died.' That's what I used to call him. At that time, I was 21 years old," she recalled.

Unable to believe the news, she initially assumed it was a prank.

"When I got that call, my reaction was, 'Stop pranking me.' When I called my sister, she wouldn't pick up. There was no caller ID at the time; this was over 20 years ago. When someone finally picked up and told me he had died, I asked what had happened. They said he had been murdered."

Kazim described the aftermath as the darkest chapter of her life.

"That period was the most painful and difficult time of my life. There were a lot of ups and downs, and many people in my life showed their true colours," she said. "It was a really frightening time."

Although her relationship with her father remained unresolved, Kazim said she never stopped hoping it would improve. "The problem is that before our relationship could be resolved, he passed away," she said.

She recalled thinking of him years later while receiving the Tamgha-e-Imtiaz.

"I was standing there and spoke to him in my mind. I said, 'I told you I was capable despite being called stupid and hyper, and despite your belief that women should stay at home.' I was waiting to get older so I could explain all of this to him and tell him how my brain works. Maybe then we could have become best friends."

Kazim also revealed that her father had been physically abusive during her childhood. "When I was little, my parents got divorced. I would stay with my dad on weekends and my mom during the week. My dad was very violent. He used to hit all of us a lot," she said.

Despite those experiences, she said she had come to accept that her father, like everyone else, had both positive and negative qualities. "But in English they say, 'You should not speak ill of the dead,'" she said.

"His violence was one part of him, but he was also friendly and loving. This happens. Every person has two sides. The side we saw wasn't the one others saw. The world knew him as a great person."

She added that she had always imagined rebuilding their relationship once she became independent.

"I always thought that once I was older and no longer dependent on him, I would become his friend. I had it all planned. Then he was gone. I thought, Dad is not here, my aunt is not here, and I have lost my grandmother. The people I was becoming successful for were gone."

According to Kazim, many of the conflicts stemmed from her father's traditional views on gender roles. "He believed women should behave a certain way. I was just a child who wanted to live. I wanted to climb trees and set off fireworks. I didn't know how to be a girl or a boy."

Kazim also spoke about her family life with husband Feisal Naqvi, saying she rejects the term "stepchildren" because of its negative associations. "I have two bonus babies. I don't like the word 'step' because there are so many negative connotations attached to it. I love them. They're awesome human beings. Dania is 28, Kamal is 25."

She said her own children are Hamza, 20, Hassan, who is nine and turning 10, and Noor Bano, who will turn six in October.

Kazim also revealed that she shares a close friendship with Naqvi's former wife, Aida, describing their relationship as an example of successful co-parenting.

"Aida and I are good friends. 'Co-parenting' is a big concept abroad. It's about having a blended family," she said. "When you separate, it shouldn't affect the children." "For me, when I married Feisal, I married Feisal, Dania, Kamal and, in a sense, his ex-wife too."

The actor concluded by reflecting on the three women who had the greatest influence on her life: her grandmother, mother and aunt.

She said her late grandmother, who died when Kazim was nine, remained her biggest role model.

"She was a huge role model in my life. I was very attached to her, and she understood me even more than my own mother. If I ever left this world, I would want to be remembered with as much love and admiration as people remember her."

Kazim currently hosts the morning show Morning at Home and continues to work as an actor, content creator and entrepreneur. She also runs the brands Nur by Juggun and Juggun's Organics, and is known for her performances in dramas including Pani Jaisa Pyar, Vasl and, most recently, Agar.