Mathira talks teenagers and toxic parenthood

Actor shares tricks to foster healthy family dynamics

Pakistani-Zimbabwean performer Mathira Mohammad recently made an appearance on a morning show, where she imparted details on her experience with motherhood, in order to advise folks struggling with what she deemed as "toxic" households.

When questioned about how to carry oneself around mothers with vicarious expectations, Mathira confessed, "Distancing yourself from your family is impossible. I will never say, break off your bond with your mother, but do show her the mirror whenever she is wrong."

The model further elaborated by stating that a gentle solution can be achieved without resorting to violent methods, such as raising one's voice. "If that fails," Mathira added, "raise an emotional wall, and try not to take things too seriously."

Moreover, she claimed that children who are used to surrendering to toxic households are more likely to develop platonic and romantic relationships that are detrimental to their mental wellbeing, only to satisfy the ingrained need to please. According to Mathira, an individual yearns for bonds similar to those they were forced to adapt to as children, no matter their gender.

"Generational trauma has a bearing on the kind of love a growing person becomes attuned to," the celebrity said. "A happier generation must emerge from a damaged one," she added, as a message to parents like herself.

"I have ADHD and dyslexia," Mathira shared, as she confessed struggling with her studies as a child. She alluded to those challenges as she raised her next point, "When your kids are having these problems, it is important to dig into why this is happening. Do not call them dumb. Do not blame them."

"When they are teenagers, please ignore your kids. You need to give them that space," the 32-year-old emphasised, while also urging parents not to completely cast away their children. According to the actress, it is imperative for teenagers to understand the importance of responsibilities, such as finances and household tasks.

While Mathira encouraged her co-guests and audiences to not outright spell out the burdens of these responsibilities, she suggested making them passively aware of these dealings, such as through bills. "This makes them aware of what these things are worth," she said.

"My sons wash the dishes and they get paid for that," she shared. "Another son makes his bed and he gets paid for that. This is their salary. When they get this money, they realise the value of these things."

Mathira's insights offer creative possibilities for parents to ease their children into the inevitable responsibilities of adulthood.