Zendaya opens up about being a child star

Zendaya struggled with feeling the need to be "this perfect being...and live up to all these expectations."

Zendaya is opening up about the complexities of growing up in the spotlight.

In a joint interview with Vogue and British Vogue for their May cover, the 27-year-old Challengers actress reflected on how her early fame has shaped her perspective.

"I don’t know how much of a choice I had," she admitted. "I have complicated feelings about kids and fame and being in the public eye, or being a child actor. We’ve seen a lot of cases of it being detrimental." Zendaya, who rose to prominence with Disney's Shake It Up and later starred in Spider-Man: Homecoming, believes she's only now beginning to understand the impact of her unusual childhood.

"I think only now, as an adult, am I starting to go, Oh, okay, wait a minute: I’ve only ever done what I’ve known, and this is all I’ve known." She explained that she feels like she's going through a delayed teenage rebellion: "I felt like I was thrust into a very adult position... I was becoming the breadwinner of my family very early... becoming grown, really."

Zendaya shared that she struggled with feeling the need to be "this perfect being...and live up to all these expectations." This pressure, she believes, makes it hard to fully enjoy her current career milestones. "Now, when I have these moments in my career... I feel like I shrink...I'm very tense, and I think that I carry that from being a kid and never really having an opportunity to just try s---."

Despite her success, the Euphoria star confessed, "And I wish I went to school."

Zendaya's role in Challengers marks a shift, as her character is older than the high-school roles she typically plays. "I’m always in a high school somewhere... And, mind you, I never went to high school."

The actress also expressed a desire to connect with more peers in Hollywood who share her background. "I keep to myself a lot... but I would love to see more who look a little bit more like me around me. I think that that is something that is crucial and necessary.”

Challengers premieres in theaters on April 26th. Vogue's May 2024 issue will be on newsstands on April 23rd.

Zendaya for Vogue's May 2024 issue. Photo: ANNE LEIBOVITZ/VOGUE