Aik tou chori, upar se hawa khori

Published: January 16, 2020


PHOTO: TWITTER The writer is a political analyst. He can be reached at Twitter @Imran_Jan

Pakistani politicians never run short of leaving us amused with their statements after they have left us disappointed with their actions. Creative yet mindboggling statements such as “kyun nikala?”, “Meri London mei tau kya Pakistan mei bhi koi property nahi”, “Germany and Japan are neighbours”, and “Jab barish hota hai tau pani aata hai,” have provided us some relief from the otherwise dull existence.

Hitting social media this week is “hawa khori”. A picture is making the rounds on social media where Nawaz Sharif is seen sitting with his partners in crime at a London restaurant. Nawaz’s son claimed in a video message for public consumption that based on the doctor’s advice Nawaz was taken out on a stroll for fresh air. I wonder what kind of fresh air would be available in a tiny space among other cons inside a restaurant. It’s a slap in the face of our conscience and respect, and both the PML-N and the PTI are responsible for it.

The title above is plagiarised from the famous Urdu expression but I twisted it a bit. It means despite being a thief, you had the chutzpah to venture out for fresh air. The irony is that it’s us the Pakistani people who are being mocked here.

In Pashto, there is an idiom that if you make a cat the caretaker of meat then do not complain about the cat eating it. There is a similar idiom in America that says fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. The PTI, apart from promising merit, change, accountability, and other goodies promised not to compromise. That idea was intoxicating to people who grew up watching their political leaders do corruption and avoid any consequences because the opposing politician agreed to compromise. Turns out, PTI’s innate ability is to compromise.

We must not let this fact go down the Orwellian hole that it was Imran Khan himself who single-handedly allowed Nawaz to leave the country for health reasons. Later, he tried hard to blame the judiciary but it did not work. So, today when the PTI is gleefully talking about how Nawaz is faking illness and can be seen eating at a restaurant, it’s a sign of PTI’s imbecility and tactlessness. Neither are traits one should be proud of. Imran Khan, you let this man go! Now do us all a favour and shut up for a change! Aik tau bewaqoofi, upar se bakwas (besides being an imbecile, you indulge in gibberish too).

The PTI is losing credibility more than the Sharifs because hawa khori or restaurant khori; their primary aim in being in politics is khori anyway. However, the PTI promised to stop that. Cherry on the cake, the PTI is raising an accusatory finger at the Khori Brigade it cut loose itself.

This restaurant picture and the one from inside the plane which was taking Nawaz to London are leaked by someone from the inside. Sometimes, I think it is done purposefully to tell the Pakistani people that they have lost and the thugs have won again. We have been fooled for the umpteenth time. Shame on us for believing that the tabdeeli noisemakers would do the magic.

Some media channels sympathetic to the PML-N or the journalists on the PML-N’s payroll are going to horrible lengths to sanitise their paymaster’s restaurant khori. They argue that we live in a world where optics is everything and that the Khori Brigade should have been more careful. In other words, they should have been more careful in keeping a lid on their deceit. I want to add these are also times of shameless inattention and third class citizenship on our part.

Published in The Express Tribune, January 16th, 2020.

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