For some reason, social stigmas and pressures prove more fatal for women than men.
LAHORE: This letter is in response to Juggun Kazim’s article, “I am not beyghairat!” published on May 26 in The Express Tribune. The plight of women indicated in the article sounds very familiar to me. This is not an uncommon tale. Women are forced to live up to many social expectations and put up with all kinds of social stigmas. This is when support for them becomes important and the lack of that distorts everything else, including their self-esteem, morale and confidence.
For some reason, social stigmas and pressures prove more fatal for women than men. Family breakdowns are usually seen to be the result of a woman’s career obligations or high ambitions. It is often the woman who compromises everything — both her career choices and professional ambitions. Also, in the context of a not-so-liberal society like ours, it is a fact that usually working women are akin to multitasking robots because they are often not exempted from household chores. It becomes unforgivable if they fail to balance things.
Many women today are much more educated and are equal to men in this respect. Many aspire to become as successful as their fathers or husbands. Compelling such women to stay at home and take care of their family could be unfair in an egalitarian society. Women are much more empowered today. Nevertheless, we still have a long way to go in order to grow. Following history, all successful countries today have had women working towards success and contributing a lot. Had they been forced to stay at home to cook and wash, they would probably not be where they are today.
Women are capable of holding positions just like men. They just need the opportunity to grow and this is what is lacking. Emotional downturns occur usually because of a non-understanding partner, who does not let women grab the opportunities they gain with difficulty. Therefore, we are all left with a dilemma. If their partner is not supportive, should women always lose their positions at work and adhere to social expectations of being meek, submissive, and docile, as their label pertains, or become defiant and rebellious towards what is rightfully theirs? This thought-provoking question remains unanswered.
Salma Tahir
Published in The Express Tribune, May 27th, 2014.
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