KARACHI:
Patriarchy, sexism and misogyny are deeply entrenched in the South Asian culture. As a result of this, toxic masculinity is normalised in our society and women have continuously fallen prey to it. Instead of turning a blind eye to the ongoing gender-based violence, we need to step out of our denial and call it out for what it truly is.
The brutal murder of 27-year-old Noor Mukadam by a family friend Zahir Jaffer has shaken Pakistanis to the core. It is worth noting that this is only one such case that was brought to the media’s attention. There are millions of women who are subjected to violence every single day but their plight goes unnoticed due to lack of accessibility. To address the epidemic of violence against women in Pakistan, we need to recognise and acknowledge the victim-blaming pattern that persists in our country. Victim-blaming works in the favour of the perpetrator. Instead of blaming and shaming the victim, we need better parents who raise their sons, not as entitled or privileged young men, but as responsible and sensitive adults. They ought to be brought up as men who are empathetic and respectful to the women around them. Parents should hold their sons accountable for indecent or vile behaviour. Zahir’s parents did not attend to his psychological condition, therefore they are equally culpable in this heinous murder. This incident has also drawn attention to the absence of checks and balances for rehabilitation centres. The prime suspect was reportedly a certified psychotherapist at his family-owned mental rehabilitation centre operating in Islamabad, which had falsely claimed affiliation with an international accreditation agency. This harms the credibility of ethical and certified practitioners but also discourages people from seeking therapy in Pakistan. Rehabilitation centres should be monitored closely and held accountable by the government.
All citizens need to play an active role in addressing gender-based violence because the current situation reflects our society’s moral decadence. It is our collective responsibility to call out men in our homes and social circles for any form of unethical behaviour towards women. We hope that Noor’s murder does not fade into oblivion and is not reduced to another hashtag. It must bring drastic change in the entire system.
Salma Tahir
Lahore
Published in The Express Tribune, August 1st, 2021.
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