Women are not and should not be held responsible for the actions of the men they are related to
KARACHI: The kind of uprising that the #MeToo movement has seen ever since it began last year, one could only expect that some of the men accused could be someone they know — a husband, brother, father or a friend.
How a woman should cope in such a situation has often come under debate. Would she side with the accused? As noticed in the case of Gal Gadot when she sided with her friend, refusing to believe the woman who had accused him of alleged sexual misconduct. Or would she come out with stories of how the accused was a good man? As witnessed in Ali Zafar’s case, where multiple women such as actor Maya Ali, came out in his support, claiming that since he was so well behaved with them it is unlikely he might have harassed someone else. Or would she believe the woman completely? As we saw in the case of Sajid Khan, when his sister Farah Khan said that ‘if my brother did this he has so much to atone for and I believe the survivors.’
While all the women mentioned above may have had their reasons to say what they did, the problem of giving so much importance what women in the lives of an accused say or believe, shifts the focus off the man and puts it on the women.
Women are not and should not be held responsible for the actions of the men they are related to, or to put too much burden on them to openly condemn. This once again perpetuates the idea that ‘boys will be boys’ and the women in their lives should have done better.
Men should be held accountable where needed and the focus shouldn’t be the women, the one who was harassed.
Ramsha Jhangir
Published in The Express Tribune, October 27th, 2018.
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