Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate!

Who cares how many calories it has? With a chocolate bar in my hands, I’m invincible.

Chocolate – the mere mention of this word sends shivers down my spine. You cannot even begin to imagine the lengths people go to, to get their favourite high.

If you dig through history books, I’m sure you’ll come across at least a dozen wars that were fought for the love of chocolate – if this is not the case, then all historians are big-fat liars. People idolise TV stars and scientists, but I personally am a huge fan of Willy Wonka – heck, I’d even settle for one of the Oompa Loompas (don’t care if they are real or not – even Santa’s got fans, for crying out loud).

Being a newlywed, you’d picture me thinking about my beloved all day long. This holds true for most of the time I spend away from her, but when I crave chocolate, I only fantasise about holding one in my hands and square-dancing with one, then taking the wrapper off slowly, enjoying every little tearing sound, and then biting into it like there’s no tomorrow. Who cares how many calories it has? And oh, the things I’d do to a chocolate bar on the Titanic – you’d forget all about the infamous Jack-and-Rose move on the bow with their hands spread on either side, pretending to fly. With a chocolate bar in my hands waiting to be unwrapped, I’m invincible. A great man once said to the love of his life, “Everything I do, I do it for you” – I’d say the same to a chocolate bar (“I’d fight for you, I’d lie for you, walk the wire for you, Ooh! I'd die for you…”).

I’m sure by now you are all vouching for my insanity; fortunately for me, I’m not the only one. What follow, are a few exceptional quotations by chocolate lovers around the globe:

1. Stress wouldn’t be so hard to take if it were chocolate-coated


2. Chocolate is the answer, who cares what the question is?


3. Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don’t even need an appointment!


4. I’m a person of many moods and they all require chocolate


5. There is no chocoholics anonymous because no one wants to quit


6. Money talks but chocolate sings


7. Equal parts of dark chocolate and white chocolate make a balanced diet


8. I never met a chocolate I didn’t like; wish I could say the same for all the girls in my life


9. Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate

If these don’t get your juices flowing, nothing will. So go grab a bar (or pack) of your favourite chocolate because what follows, is an irresistible recipe for a rich Mocha Java cake.

The perfect Mocha Java cake  Ingredients for sponge cake 3 Eggs ¼ tsp vanilla essence 6 tbsp castor sugar 6 tbsp or 3 oz flour (slightly heaped) 1 tbsp or 3 oz cocoa powder (heaped) coffee sauce (mix ½ tsp coffee and 1½ tbsp castor sugar in ¼ cup warm water) Method Pre-heat oven to 180º C. Mix eggs and sugar in a bowl and beat until peaks form (light and fluffy). Add in vanilla essence, flour and cocoa powder, and fold using a rubber spatula. Pour the mixture in a 9" inch greased springform pan and bake for 18 to 22 minutes. Once baked, cut horizontally about ½ to 1 inch from the base; this will form the base of your cake. Place the base back in the springform pan. Pour the coffee sauce evenly on the sponge base. Ingredients for Java (coffee) mousse 1 tbsp instant coffee (use ½ tbsp more for a stronger taste) 6-7 tbsp icing sugar 1 tbsp gelatin powder ¼ cup water 12 oz whipped cream (chilled) ⅓ cup milk Method Heat water and dissolve the gelatin till it melts. Add milk, sugar and coffee to it; keep stirring on a very low flame to form a smooth mixture. Let this mixture cool at room temperature. Fold the mixture into the whipped cream with a rubber spatula. Pour this on top of the sponge base in the springfoam pan and spread it evenly with a spatula. Keep in the freezer for 1 hour Ingredients for mocha (chocolate) mousse 1 tbsp instant coffee (optional - add only if you enjoy its flavour) 4 oz dark chocolate (use less for a milder taste) 8 tbsp icing sugar 1 tbsp gelatin powder ¼ cup water 12 oz whipped cream (chilled) ½ cup milk Method Heat water and dissolve the gelatin till it melts. Add milk, sugar, coffee and chocolate to it; keep stirring on a very low flame till the chocolate melts, resulting in a smooth mixture. Let this mixture cool at room temperature. Fold the mixture into the whipped cream with a rubber spatula. Pour this over the Java mousse layer in the pan and spread it evenly with a spatula. Keep in the freezer for 1 hour Ingredients for hot fudge 2 oz dark or semi-sweet chocolate (coarsely chopped) 1 tbsp butter ½ can condensed milk ½ a pinch of salt 2 to 3 drops vanilla essence Method Put the chocolate and the butter in a glass bowl and heat it in the microwave for 20 seconds Mix thoroughly and heat in the microwave at 10-second intervals (repeat if required) till it's nice and smooth. Note: chocolate burns very easily so keep it in the microwave for very short intervals, and as soon as you remove from the microwave, mix vigorously with a spoon to stop the heating process Now add the condensed milk and salt to the mixture and put it in the microwave for 15-second intervals till it's smooth Add the vanilla essence and let it cool Pour on top of the cake and put it in the freezer for another ½ hour before serving