Social networking: Twitter quitter!

Published: December 19, 2011
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If one needs to make a Twitter account to gain popularity,
then i am fine with being a nobody. ILLUSTRATION: JAMAL KHURSHID

If one needs to make a Twitter account to gain popularity, then i am fine with being a nobody. ILLUSTRATION: JAMAL KHURSHID

A few days ago my friend made me realise that I am a “nobody” because I don’t use Twitter. Unlike the manic hordes of teenagers obsessing over Facebook and Twitter, I don’t like social networking. (Yes, kill me for that).

So yes, I am not on Twitter and I am too lazy to bother about making a Twitter account. But my friends did not excuse my absence on Twitter and made me feel like a pariah in society. In fact, they made me feel like an otherworldly creature because apparently only aliens don’t use Twitter. So alas I just got sick of them mocking me and finally decided to be somebody. Sigh!

I finally made my account on Twitter and then fell asleep with the satisfaction that, now, at least I am somebody. But the very next day, a miracle of sorts happened. I logged in to my fresh new Twitter account to confirm that I am somebody and realised that I had attracted twenty followers — all strangers — within eight hours of making my account.

Thank you guys for following me; it’s nice to have followers and the bigger that number is the more of a “somebody” I am. But who are these people? Do I want to tweet personal stuff for them to read? Are they even real people? Yes, I can block people from following me, but then what is Twitter all about?

And another disturbing thing is the spam that I have encountered. Spam is part of the internet and you can’t really escape from it while web surfing, but with Twitter one just drowns in spam. Be it just spam accounts that follow you or the automatic direct messages that try to sell you stuff you don’t want, the quantity of spam is just unmanageable.

I feel that Twitter is just like a Bieber fan page these days. The presence of Justin Bieber has turned Twitter into a platform for attracting his fans. I am not a Belieber for sure but I am not exactly his diehard fan either. But on Twitter, all I come across is Bieber-related stuff. Why must I have to encounter him on Twitter when I am clearly not interested in following live updates about his life?

And by the way, have you ever read a single thing on Twitter that actually enlightened you in any way. Have you? Keep thinking… I am waiting for your response. Thought of something yet? Yeah, me neither. Everything said and circulated on Twitter is absolutely pointless. I don’t care about the sandwich someone has just eaten or that they are heading out to work. People really need to stop pretending that they are celebrities when they are not and believe that people are interested in knowing about their lives. I, for one, am not.

Twitter is a very successful social networking site for professionals or journalists, but not for teenager like me. So I have decided to abandon Twittering once and for all. If next time someone ridicules me for being a nobody then I will simply tell them I am from Mars and aliens just don’t like to tweet.

Published in The Express Tribune, December 10th, 2011.

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Reader Comments (4)

  • Tee
    Dec 19, 2011 - 2:36PM

    Twitter was basically a marketing tool for companies who were coming up with different products on a regular basis. Then it attracted the big guns, who could get more in contact with their followers via it.

    The best part of twitter is that, you can choose to become a ‘follower’ or a ‘tweeter’ based on whichever you like. Nobody can complain to that! And no, you’re not an alien or from Mars. I recently closed my Facebook account and feel so good about it :)

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  • Abbas
    Dec 19, 2011 - 2:42PM

    Wow.. nice article! Thank you for sharing your views.

    I’m totally agree with you because the same drama was happening with me since one and half month. Twitter is just a waste of time, there no such activity or beneficial for teenagers.

    facebook is far better than twitter. then comes Google+

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  • Fahd
    Dec 19, 2011 - 3:09PM

    Excellent write up! One should not use these social networking sites, it takes us from the real world into a digital world, which in reality has no existance. Better to be close to nature. If you a re so fond of socializing, meet people rather then tewwting or following them.
    Agree with the writer! thumbs up to take such an initiative !

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  • Snoopy
    Dec 20, 2011 - 12:41AM

    Here are my two cents to this:

    Absolute crap, that you have talked about so far. If you really join twitter and give it a few hours (read: learning curve) without this pre-biased view point, then you’ll surely come across the benefits.
    Firstly, why have you blogged about something? Because you want to express your view point. Similar is the case with twitter. You can express what’s on your mind. What’s wrong with that? Are all the people here the ones you know? No. But still we get to see your opinion. Again, twitter is a “micro-blog” if you may.
    Secondly, you asked what we learn through twitter. Well honestly, since I’ve started using twitter on my phone, I hardly need to go see the news every hour, or anything. All the headline are updated in real time. Conversations or the ongoings between people of your interest are there for you and you can always join in.
    I can go on and on about this, but I believe I don’t have to. I’m not advocating anything here, but the least I’m doing is trying to convince you to use it without your bias. For Christ’s sake, you fell asleep right after you made your account. You’re supposed to go beyond “making yourself a twitter account, or as you say, making yourself somebody.”
    Cheers.

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