Never discuss your personal life: Shaista Lodhi talks negativity, declining standards

TV personality opened up regarding the intriguing relationship between artists and the audience

Prominent multihyphenate Shaista Lodhi recently shared insights about various facets of her life and career in an enlightening interview on The Talk Talk Show. The seasoned television personality, doctor, and mother opened up regarding challenges, personal growth, and the evolving dynamics of media and audience interaction.

The conversation commenced with a discourse on the challenges inherent in juggling multiple roles. Shaista underscored the significance of challenges in assessing oneself, remarking, "Challenges are important. If you don't challenge yourself in life, you can't test yourself."

When asked about her diverse accomplishments, Shaista modestly conveyed that she harbours aspirations for further achievements. She referred to herself as a doctor and a television personality but underscored her resonance with the role of a doctor. "There is yet a lot more to do," said Shaista. "You never know, I might be more successful than I am today. But basically, Shaista is a doctor. She's also a television personality, but I relate more to being a doctor."

Contemplating her journey, Shaista offered her perspective on how her career has metamorphosed over the years. She likened her journey to reading a book during different life phases, wherein evolving viewpoints can engender assorted interpretations of the same content. She expressed contentment with her vocation and the messages she has successfully conveyed through her shows.

"I'm in a phase where, like a book, if you read it in one phase, it's different. If you read it ten years from now, you'll conceive it differently due to your evolution. I own all those things now," revealed the television personality. "Job satisfaction is important and at that time, I thought that it's fine if I do five shows and even one or two are good. Or I've been able to give a social message, say what I want, be who I am for an instant. That's fine."

The interview delved into Shaista's upbringing within a male-dominated family. She alluded to her rebellious disposition and yearning to substantiate her capabilities, which allowed her to excel in diverse realms of life. While acknowledging her father and brothers' support, she also acknowledged the role her mother's critiques played in her development. "When you're rebellious, that's a different energy," said Shaista. "You want to prove that you aren't lesser than [the men]. Perhaps it was that energy. Then, my father and my own brothers supported me a lot in everything. Mother imparts criticism, but that's okay."

Exploring her role as a mother, Shaista elaborated upon the distinctive bond she shares with her children. She noted that her connection with her daughter is particularly profound owing to her own experiences as a woman. "As a mother, I learned a lot from my mother," shared Shaista. "Even though in the beginning, my sons would disagree, especially my elder son. A mother has a different connection with the eldest child. But it's not like that with me. I feel my connection and concern for my daughter might be more, because of, obviously, my own experience."

Shaista also imparted insights garnered from her eleven-year stint hosting morning shows. One of the foremost lessons she assimilated was the prudence of refraining from discussing personal matters on television. "Frankly, I think never discuss your personal life," stated Shaista. "Do not discuss it on television. The television audience is watching you. Their upbringing is different. They have their own life experiences and journeys. They conceive and perceive you differently. But in your efforts to be honest, to showcase your authentic self, sometimes, being too honest is not great either."

When asked if the same holds true for social media, Shaista asserted, "Yes, more so on social media. The television audience is limited, regardless of the channel. But the entire world is watching you on social media. There are diverse kinds of people. They have a license - because once you're on social media, you're there. You've not held anything back [from the audience]. You haven't hidden anything. Consequently, the audience, that sees it as their duty to say whatever nasty thing they want, they will."

With a media career spanning more than two decades, Shaista shed light on how the audience has changed over time. "I think that with social media influence and a lot more, the audience has deteriorated. The calibre of the audience has decreased. I think that in efforts of being too open, we hurt people. We don't have a bar, no control over our tongues, pens. We can write whatever we want, however we want, and we don't realise that freedom of speech comes with responsibility." 

She further stated, "That doesn't mean that whatever I want to say about in any manner, I do so. Once the matter is out of one's hands, it's gone. [You don't have the] freedom to hurt...Anyone can be caught in this fire. The fire that we were once in and still are, the rate at which it is burning through - it's mental trauma. Psychology talks so much about childhood trauma. don't you think this is such an abusive relationship between the artist and their audience where both sides can get angry and say anything to each other? It may not hit you at the moment but it remains there and will hit you any time in life."

She also spoke about the concept of artists being seen as public property. "Being public property doesn't mean this. Not even us, even for our politicians - whatever my role is, focus on that. You don't have the right [to say otherwise.] Yes, you can write about what we wear, gaining inspiration from that. It's fine for your fashion inspiration, but it shouldn't be more than that," she said. 

Regarding negative feedback, Shaista candidly admitted its impact, akin to anyone else. "Yes, I am affected. And those who say that they are not affected, they are too. It's not possible...We must make a conscious effort to not hurt others with our words. Look at my entire career. I have never tried to hurt anyone in my programs. I will go till where you have permitted me to. If I exceed - I'll know, you can feel the vibes. You know how much you can question a guest. It should be a human rule. It's not my job as a host to dig through your personal life and ask."

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